Drastic height differences can be nice: she feels dainty and he feels manly. But when it causes problems in the boudoir, here’s how to fix it!
No one wants to be in an awkward position with their partner, especially in the bedroom. However, if you’re 5 feet tall and your partner is 6 feet tall, things can really get awkward. Your bodies might be lining up in places they normally wouldn’t.
Having a big height difference with your partner can make having sex really tricky, not to mention a tad uncomfortable. You are limited in the positions that will work for you, and you have to do certain things only one at a time. Furthermore, the bedroom should be one of the few places where you are able to be uninhibited with your bodies, but if you have a big height difference, you might find yourselves becoming too self-conscious and feeling more apprehensive than excited at the thought of sex.
Hot tips to erase the height difference in bed
If your significant other is taller than you, or vice versa, try out the following sex tips to make things a little more comfortable *and enjoyable* during your romps in the sheets.
#1 Invest in a wedge pillow. If you really want to enjoy more sex positions, you need to invest in a good, firm wedge pillow. There are wedge pillows specially designed for sex, but there are also regular wedge pillows that can do the trick just as well. What’s great about this pillow is that it is versatile and allows you or your partner to get into positions that might otherwise be very hard to pull off. The shape is ideal to provide enough support for the hips or knees, giving you or your partner an added boost or height advantage.
#2 Do it wet. If the penetrator, or the man, is taller, shower sex can be frustrating—not to mention potentially dangerous. So the best place for you to enjoy being wet and wild is in the pool or bathtub. For example, you can do a cowgirl or reverse cowgirl while sitting near the edge of the hot tub or on the steps of a pool.
If the penetrator is shorter than their partner, shower sex is possible, with the help of some safety trappings. Make sure you have a bath mat with extra grips that can provide enough traction so you will not slip. You will also need shower bars to hold onto for support as you try out doggy style and other variants that are comfortable for you and your partner. [Read: 9 wild ways to have sex in the shower and enjoy it!]
#3 Do the doggy. Just because you have a huge height difference doesn’t mean you can’t do it the way those with more equivalent heights do. If the taller one is the penetrator, then the smaller one could lie down and have the handy wedge pillow *or just a bunch of regular pillows* on her hips for extra elevation. You can even use the armrests on your couch for this while the penetrator stands up. If the penetrator is shorter, you can both make use of the stairs or simply have the receiving partner kneel on the bed with the buttocks close to the feet, while the penetrator kneels on the bed. [Read: 9 easy tips to make doggy style your new favorite sex position]
#4 Spoon it. For couples with a huge height difference, especially when the penetrator is taller, spooning is the perfect position. You can call it an equalizer position, because neither will have the weight of their partner on them, making both comfortable. For spooning, just adjust your alignments with each other—someone may need to crouch at a different angle in order to fit the other.
#5 Hit the wall. With this position, your sex life will never hit a wall, so to speak. Wall sex is perfect for partners where the penetrator is taller and is able to lift their partner. For extra support, you can have your partner lean against the wall while you support them with your hands on their buttocks. If the penetrator is shorter, you can still have a variant of wall sex, but use a chair instead. Your partner can sit on the chair while you stand in front. Your partner will be facing you, legs spread and wrapped around you as you penetrate.
#6 Side 69. This position is perfect for foreplay. Although 69-ing the traditional way may be impossible, you can try another variant. Get into a spoon position, but this time, face each other while lying on your sides. Adjust your position by crouching here and extending there, and you are guaranteed to have an amazing time.
#7 Sitting cowgirl. In this position, whether you are shorter or taller than your partner, you can be sure to enjoy each other with a very close and intimate penetration. The sitting cowgirl position has the penetrator sitting down either on the edge of the bed or on the floor. Meanwhile, the partner will be straddling, like in a rodeo, and moving up and down or rocking forward and backward. This position is very intimate and will provide you both with intense sexual pleasure. [Read: 19 ways to own the cowgirl position and make it hotter!]
#8 Get more props. For a more pleasurable and exciting experience, you can try adding props to your sexy deeds to take your romp to the next level. Have a go with the sex swing for some fun in the bedroom. You can even adjust this to suit your height so that the height difference between you and your partner won’t be much of a problem.
#9 Experiment. Don’t let your height difference dampen your mood and affect your intimacy. You are the only person who knows your body best, and you also have a very good idea of what your partner finds pleasurable. Many of the tips above are great for couples with a major height difference, but the secret is to find what works best for you. After all, great sex involves practice and experimentation—you only learn by doing.
#10 Be open. Another way to find out what you and your partner like is by constantly talking to each other about what makes you both comfortable and what gets you off. As with any relationship, openness and communication is important. The same goes with the things that happen in the bedroom. Even better than being great in action is being great in communication. By telling your partner what you like and listening to what your partner likes, you can both hit all the right angles and have a fantastic romp. [Read: 14 tips to get your partner to open up about sex]
#11 Maintain your sense of humor. While you are experimenting, you will experience many hits and misses. To get through these mishaps without being discouraged or jaded requires you to maintain your sense of humor. There will be times when trying out different sex positions will cause you both to fumble or fall. Laughing it off can take the edge and the pressure off. Keeping a positive outlook is also helpful, rather than being so focused on fitting each other that you lose all the fun in the experience.
#12 There is more to you than sex. So what if sex is awkward? There is more to your relationship than sex. If penetration is awkward and uncomfortable, you can pleasure each other in other ways. Heighten the pleasure by building the excitement leading up to the so-called main event. In fact, there really is more fun to be had, so don’t hesitate to use your hands, mouths, toys, and other props to not only make sex more fun, but also more pleasurable. [Read: 13 ways to make your bedroom more romantic]
These tips are helpful in making lovemaking more fun and memorable, even if a big height difference poses a problem. Just remember that these tips only serve as guides and it really is up to you and your partner to know what works for you.