Sex with an Ex – The Truth about Ex Sex



sex with an ex - ex sex

Why is sex with an ex so darn irresistible? Find out why we want it so badly, and read about the perfect times to have sex with an ex and the imperfect times when we should avoid it.

Click here to read the introduction about getting back with an ex for sex and the reason behind the urge.

Every time we meet a fond ex, our hearts fill with moist love.

And there’s also the intense spark of lust that springs up if you meet an ex after ages.

Sexual attraction and exes

You know how it feels, a simple touch can be electrifying.

Remember your ex from college, the same one who makes your legs go weak even now?

Imagine you bump into the same person tonight, and guess what, that person has now become one of the hottest things in the room.

What do you do after you say hello, hug and grab a drink?

Would you be able to resist having sex with an ex, if there’s no one to hold you back? [Read: The flirting touch]

Having sex with an ex

Straight from the horse’s mouth, try to avoid having sex with an ex unless it’s inevitable.

It’s hard enough to stay friends after a break up. It’s not worth it to jeopardize a good memory on something like a hook-up. Hook-ups tend to mess your relationships a lot more, and it can also hold you back from getting involved with other new and more meaningful relationships.

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The issue can get a lot worse if you’re already in love with someone else. If an ex isn’t worth dating and this new love interest is, then why keep fall for the lusty fling of an ex?

Having an affair with an ex

When you break up with someone, you’re trying to take a step forward and move on in life. Trying to have a have sex with an ex is very easy, but it’s also madness.

Not only would it make you feel guilty, it can also confuse you. On one hand, you’d think about an ex with whom the sex felt so good it makes you wanna cry. On the other, you have a new lover who is deeply in love with you, but somehow, the routine sex is a wee bit less fascinating. [Read: Having an affair with a married man]

If you really want to have sex with an ex, do it if you’re certain there’s no interest in anything beyond sex. It’s not ethical, but it’s the hair of the horny dog.

Many believe it’s acceptable when you’re desperate for sex, when you really don’t care for that person anymore emotionally or otherwise. If that’s the case, call your ex and try hooking up, but never make it a regular routine. And don’t have sex with your ex if you’re seeing someone else. It’s never really worth it. And you’d realize how stupid you’ve been the second both of you have orgasmed in bed.

When is having sex with an ex hot?

Having sex with an ex is a good thing if you are single, and so is your ex. It can give you the much needed break from sexual frustrations. And it makes things easier.

Hooking up with someone new just for recreational values can be quite long and winding. But with an ex, both of you know exactly what the other person wants, and you can skip the part where you run around trees and get straight to bed.

Sex with an ex is like getting intimate with someone you know and trust, and they can provide the perfect mix of pleasure and security. You’re not treading on any new ground, you know what to expect, and you like that.

When is having sex with an ex not hot?

If you must really know the truth, having sex with an ex rarely ends up as sweet and enjoyable as you think. It may just be the chemicals in our bodies, or something deeper, but almost always, an attachment is formed with an ex after sex, where you’d be left with mixed feelings.

One part of you would just want to fall in love with your ex again, while the other part knows the relationship can’t really last. Mostly, at some point, you’d have to choose between your ex and your present amore, or you may just end up having an affair.

I hope you do remember this is your ex we’re talking about. There’s a reason the relationship didn’t work out the first time around.

It takes a certain amount of control to judge a sex buddy a.k.a. ex lover as something purely physical and nothing more. An occasional hook up now and then has every chance of blooming into a passionate relationship. And let’s face it, do you really think you can survive the romance together with all the differences coming up all over again? [Read: How to find love]

Are you fu*king or falling in love?

It’s not easy to leave emotions out of the picture. You may think you’re James Bond or one of his lusty women who can just swing, jump and walk away without a second look, but walking out of your ex’s bedroom wouldn’t be easy. Feelings and hopes of a second chance start springing up now and then, and with each round of good sex, you can’t help but think “hey, the sex is awesome, should I give this relationship another go?”

Are both of you surely out of love? Fat chances are, one of you may still be in love with other, and keep it a secret.

This is especially true in recent break ups where one partner is ready to accept anything just to have more contact with the ex. This sort of a relationship is the worst, because everything starts to spiral around lust and love, and it tends to get nasty when one of you wants out.  Even otherwise, old wounds open up, and very soon, both of you would be left wondering “are we having a fling or have we got back together?!” [Read: Fuck buddy guide]

Sex with an ex – The verdict

Remember, having sex with an ex is hot, but as with everything else that’s exceptionally good, there are several snappy reactions that can come into the picture.

As tempting as it can be, focus on why you broke up with your ex in the first place. And if you have to be friends, try not to think of them as moving sex toys. It may feel nice at first, but it only takes a few passionate nights together in bed to bring back the old memories of a love that never was, and a few more nights of carnal abuse to mess your world up.

So have sex with an ex if you think you’ve got nothing to lose. But otherwise, keep your privates as far away from each other as possible.

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  • phillip

    yah i would like to say that having sex and getting back together after while with an ex is not always a bad idea people change over time and over time new relationships can be acheived if they work at it and come to respect each other again.

  • someone

    um.. i have hooked up with my ex twice after we broke up.. nothing emotional because our relationship was bs in the 1st place..we just have ‘fun’ together. we’re both single and young and we like to experiment with each other. so it’s fun! :)

  • rock

    Im gng to meet my ex gf after two months of breakup so how should i personally approch her for sex for last time sake without hurting her but im not sure whether shebis dating or not with other guy after breakup we were almost six years in relation

  • hailey marie

    My ex and I just broke up after a year and 1 month.. he has broken up with me 3 different times I broke up with him 1 at the beginning.. we have been fuck budys every time we break up the sex with him is so awesome everytime bwe do it i feel like ik in heaven but theresvmore to it than I am in love with him he is confused on his feelings for me and is scared of commitment I guess n wants his cake and eat it too part of me says go for it its either sex or have nothin n I choose the sex :-) he showed me the man under the mask but I still havent gone anywhere im still here hoping for another chance but in my heart n mind I inow hes scared to committe. So thats why I choose to be his fuxk buddy

  • mark

    I find it hard to concentrate. I keep going to the theaters to mind fuck this girl who flirts with me everytime I see her. Lately, I’ve been contacting my ex trying to get her into my bed again. I know how but my conscience won’t let me. It’s hard to remain platonic when all I want to do is get her to show me that vulnerable side. I know what to say and that’s what makes me feel stupid. Damn this conscience.

  • Joe

    Me and my girl where together 12 year with a 3 year old we broke up 3 month ago and she has started dating this other guy,but since new year we have been secretly meeting up for sex and I’m talking about all day from 8-4 then I scamper before her mum comes home,she’s obviously having to tell her new man lies aswell as he’s paranoid person,she now has her own place n we have been meeting up there when our kid is asleep,confused whether she still wants me or unsure because she wouldn’t be seeing me behind this guys back if she never had feelings would she?and she was adiment about not seeing me at first because it was wrong and we only see and hear from each other about our kid,so after I said ok no probs n tryed to move on I got a text n we started talking so end of convo I said anytime u fancy a drink or a yap u know where I am,so sure enough she’s like yeah have to be through day as everyone working,and that’s how it started.she now wants to not do it anymore because she says she feels bad for this other guy and it’s messing with her head but she finished with me,what do you guys think is she still in love or unsure what she wants

  • Lori

    I recently started sleeping with my ex husband good thing is I have missed him the last 5 years and thought he had no attraction left for me. Bad thing is he is remarried do we are now have sex behind his wife’s back. In our case the bad out weighs the good, I have falling in love all over again and he is having his cake and eating it too. Why would a man who claims to care purposely hurt you all over again?

  • Kiernan

    Lori – seriously time to work on getting your priorities in order. You and your ex are two hot messes. Your ex for cheating on his new wife… and you for allowing it. Serious question – do you have a conscience? Does your ex? If not, you both belong together in whatever parallel universe that is. Grow some integrity, a moral backbone and handle your situation like an adult!

  • hannah

    i broke up with my bf 2 months ago, about 2 weeks ago we had a fight over the phone and he said so many thing that he even hurt my family, yesterday, we’re drunk and he approached me and said sorry for what he said and I forgive him. Before we talked, I had a sex with stranger, a friend that my friend brought, but he didnt know about it, so after we talked, he’s starting to kiss me and even asked me to have sex with him, then I had sex with him. I can feel that, I dont love him anymore it’s just we missed each other so much and I think it wouldn’t be the last, is it ok? I just really love how he turn my world up side down compare to that stranger, he is a great sex mate. I want to have sex but no commitment, I like it that way. “Its much better be friends with something than in a relationship with nothing”, we’re like nothing when we’re still together but it got much better when we’re not but sex only.