Want to add a naughty twist to a fun girlie party? Find out how to plan a perfect sex toy party with your friends, and get a better sex life too. By Nicola Scholes
Have you ever used a sex toy?
For most girls, holding a sex toy for the first time is an uncomfortable experience.
It makes you wonder if you’re just a tad too horny for comfort.
But really, using a sex toy doesn’t make you a pervert.
A sex toy can actually make you feel more connected with your own body and your senses.
And the best part is that you can use it with your partner to bring that naughty spark back in the bedroom.
The experience of buying a sex toy
When you’re a girl, picking up a sex toy in a dingy adult store is not the most appealing of ideas.
Having some creepy guy with his face plastered against an x-rated magazine eyeing you from head to toe as you walk down an aisle can be really awkward.
Shopping online is a lot safer and more comfortable, but the only drawback being that you can’t really feel the product in your own hands *but good user reviews can always help you there*.
But what if you could make the whole experience of shopping for a sex toy a lot more fun and personal?
Wouldn’t that just be perfect?
What if you could have a private demonstration of sex toys in the comfort of your own home while you’re hanging out with the girls, and pick up whatever you want right there?
And that’s the whole idea of a sex toy party! [Read: 10 ways to make long term sex feel like a one night stand instantly]
What is a sex toy party?
A sex toy party is a party in which a group of women gather together to learn more about sex toys and buy them. A hostess, usually a trained representative of a sex toy company, shows the different toys to the women present so they can get a better idea about the toys and how to use them.
At a sex toy party, the store is brought to you. You can see the wares and pick the ones you like in the comfort of your own home. And having a few girl friends around makes the whole experience a lot more fun and enjoyable.
My experience with a sex toy party
The first time I was invited to a sex toy party, I didn’t really know what to expect. But just to humor my sex veteran friend, I decided to tag along, for curiosity’s sake.
When I got to my friend’s place where the event was organized, it was all awkward for the first ten or so minutes. A few of the girls present there were good friends of mine, and a few other girls were complete strangers who were friends with my friend.
As the hostess started displaying the sex toys, the room was silent and toe-curlingly awkward. We looked at each other and strained a weak smile. But as soon as one rather loud girl asked the hostess something funny, the room burst out into laughter and excitement.
And once the awkwardness was banished, all the girls got a lot more courageous and bold. We hollered and giggled with each new squiggly toy, looked awestruck now and then, and eventually, had an evening that was so much fun, it’ll be hard to ever forget. [Read: The real reason why size matters to women]
The sales were done personally by the hostess in another room. You could pick up the toys right at the event or have it mailed to you. I ordered a few lubes and tingly gels, and my package reached home a few days later in a sealed brown box.
So was it fun? Definitely. The thought of having a sex toy party or visiting one may seem vulgar, but truth be told, it’s a lot of fun and an event that won’t be forgotten in a hurry.
Things you can expect to see in a sex toy party
Each sex toy manufacturer has their own range of products, but almost always, you’d see lubricants and paints *edible too*, outfits and costumes, vibrators, and a few eccentric stuff that the hostess may not readily reveal until everyone’s warmed up and ready for some seriously kinky stuff. If you or your friends are put off by the adventurous toys, explain that to your hostess beforehand.
Most of the sex toys you’d see at a sex toy party cater to couples, and that’s a great thing because your man wouldn’t have to feel so threatened when you have a sex toy party. At the end of the party, you could go home and show him your new kinky wares, and chances are, he’ll be really excited to see them and even use them with you. [Read: 10 fun and naughty sex games you can play with your boyfriend in bed]
Men and their problem with girlie sex parties
For a girl, a sex toy party is a great way to buy sex toys, and have a good laugh at the same time. But if you’re dating a guy who isn’t too secure in the relationship, you may come across a bit of resistance when you mention your plans to visit or host a sex toy party.
Several guys are just not comfortable with the idea of a girl going to a sex toy party. If a guy can watch porn when he’s alone, or if he’s happy using his hands when he doesn’t have you for company, why can’t a girl just go out there and have some harmless fun? Hypocrisy and biased rules in a relationship is one of the biggest reasons for the breakdown of relationships. [Read: Why men watch porn instead of their woman in bed]
If your guy is truly secure in the relationship, he would be excited by the idea that you’re trying to create more variety in bed by involving toys.
If you’re having a problem convincing him about the benefits of a sex toy party, explain to your man that these toys could help you explore your sexuality and get better in bed. Tell him the truth about what the party is about and what you intend to do there. If there are no guys and no one’s using any sex toys, there really isn’t a difference between these parties and a regular girl’s slumber party because it’s just a fun get-together for girls.
If he still doesn’t get it or if he takes offence, he’s probably extremely insecure. Or he may even has a streak of controlling behavior in him if he wants to be around you each time you want to experience something with your own friends. [Read: 16 ways to handle your boyfriend's biased and controlling behavior in the relationship]
A man who’s truly secure in his relationship will never feel threatened if his woman wants to go to a sex toy party to have some fun. After all, it’s just a group of girls having fun and viewing a few fun products and having a laugh about it. If he can masturbate when you’re not around, what’s wrong if you just hold a toy in your hands?
The big misconception about sex toy parties
Truth be told, there are a few misconceptions about sex toy parties. And that may make you or your man feel uncomfortable about the idea. But the reality of what happens in these girlie parties is very different from what most men who watch a lot of porn assume.
Guys have nothing to feel threatened about their woman’s sexual orientation, because no one uses any products or tries them out at a sex toy party. Nor do girls have to assume a sex toy party is a dirty get-together of horny pervy women.
The biggest sexual act you can indulge in is holding a battery operated device in your hand. And at times, the hostess may carry a tester of a few products where she would give you just a little bit of the gel or lotion on an individual q-tip or on your finger or the back of the hand. The girls can go to the bathroom and test it out on themselves if they really want to.
If you’re unsure about a toy, or not really interested in any toys, you don’t need to buy something. You can just take a look at the toys, and see if something interests you, or just have a laugh about the moving gizmos lying on the table.
The idea that sex toy parties turn into girlie orgies are just a sexual fantasy of men that’s fed by the porn industry. It’s just like any other get-together for girls, really. [Read: Top 10 male sexual fantasies and top 10 female sexual fantasies]
How to plan a perfect sex toy party
If you’re bored of the typical party and are interested in hosting a sex toy party, good for you. A well planned sex toy party can be a great hit with your friends, and leave them with a fun experience too.
Wondering how to plan a sex toy party? Use these 7 steps to throw your own sex toy party for your friends.
#1 The perfect party hostess. Google a good sex toy representative *recommendations would help a lot here* and see if you can find someone you feel comfortable with, and lives around your area code. Most sex toy representatives are housewives or part time employees who partner with sex toy manufacturers to earn a commission on the sales they make.
A good sex toy party hostess should be fun and pleasant company. And most importantly, make sure they’re trained and well educated about the toys they’re selling. Finding someone who only cares about making sales will make your party feel more like a sales pitch instead of a fun evening with the girls.
#2 Prepare an invitation. Your preferred sex toy representative should help you here. Do you want to send an e-invitation or do you want to print out a fancy designed card? You could print out free party invitation templates online and create your own personal invitation to your select group of friends. Make sure the letter’s personal, fun and naughty.
Let your friends know what to expect. They really don’t have to try the toys in person. Most guys assume girls sit together with their pants around their ankles, or at least that’s what my boyfriend thought! Blame that on a male’s active imagination. No one tries anything. You can see and touch, but you can’t use them. The products are passed around the room, but no one tries it.
#3 Choose your party. Sex toy parties are almost always all-girl events. But some toy parties can also be coed, especially if all the girls have partners who don’t mind having a bit of fun with toys. A few sex toy hostesses cater strictly to only all-girl audiences, so if you want to invite a few guys to the party, make sure you have a word about it with your hostess first. [Read: 30 sexy ways to spice up your sex life]
#4 Sex toy food. Good food is an integral part of all great parties. But at a sex toy party, it isn’t just about serving food, it’s all about serving suggestive food!
Meatballs and sausages strategically arranged together, longer fruits, and other suggestive food and pastries always make for fun conversations and laughs. And it can definitely help set the atmosphere just right.
#5 Conversations. Finding a perfect hostess may be very important. But if your friends don’t feel involved or if they feel too awkward to open up and have some fun, the sex toy party may start to get extremely boring.
To get your friends into the mood, talk about a funny sex toy incident, or ask your hostess to talk about a few experiences with sex toys. Once your friends realize that there’s nothing awkward about holding a sex toy, they’ll be a lot more enthusiastic about the whole thing *it’s usually the quiet ones that are most enthusiastic after a while*. [Read: 30 dirty truth or dare questions for a sexy couples night]
#6 Ordering your products. Speak with your friends and your hostess about how you want the business transactions to take place. It’s usually preferable if the hostess can wait in another private room after the demonstration, so each of your friends can privately speak to the hostess and order their own sex toys and fetishist costumes without feeling awkward about it. [Read: The beginners guide to sexy role playing and costumes]
But if it’s just a group of close girl friends who don’t care who’s around, well, order away in front of each other!
#7 Confidentiality. A sex toy party is a fun event for the girls involved. But don’t share your invitation with the whole world. Not everyone you invite may be too happy to share their sex toy party tales with the rest of the world. Try to ensure that only the invited friends know about the sex toy party, and no one else does. In a world where we’d always be judged by prudes, it’s better to avoid stirring an unnecessary controversy. [Read: How to make your man go down on you without a push]
It can be a lot of giggles and fun, and it’s definitely an experience worth having at least once, even if you’re not really into sex toys.
Now that you know what a sex toy party is all about, and how to host a sex toy party at your own place, plan something fun with your girl friends. It’ll surely be a fun event that’s worth having, and if you find the right toys, it’ll be a lot more fun in bed too!
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