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How to Last Longer in Bed: 34 Sex Secrets for Men to Go Long & Hard

Have you been having a little trouble going the distance in bed lately? No worries, here is how to last longer in bed, helping you to delay that orgasm. 

how to last longer in bed

For a girl, multiple orgasms are a fun thing to experience. But when you’re a guy, ejaculating too soon can spell doom to your sex life. Premature ejaculation can leave you feeling frustrated, dejected, and arm-twist you into losing all your confidence when it comes to matters of the bedroom. It’s unfortunate that you have to deal with this, but fret not, because there are really fun ways to learn how to last longer in bed.

All it takes is a bit of effort and a bit of time.

[Read: How to keep your erection up and high for longer]

Learning how to last longer during sex is entirely possible

If you want to last longer during sex and you’re not really suffering from a medical condition, then these tips will definitely help you last a lot longer. After all, you need to remember that the experience of sex is more in the head than in between your legs.

If you feel confident about your sexual capabilities, you’d definitely be able to perform better with your woman. [Read: What is foreplay? 17 moves to make them horny AND last longer]

Don’t let premature ejaculation get in the way of a great sex life. Instead, learn to get better at controlling your ejaculation and everything will be just fine.

And here’s a startup tip for you, if you ever end up ejaculating within a few minutes, don’t hate yourself for it. Lie back and rest for half an hour or so. You’ll be ready by then and raring to go, and you’ll definitely last a lot longer and satisfy her too! [Read: The natural aphrodisiacs sitting in your kitchen you need to try]

How to last longer in bed – Everyday tips to try

Here are a few everyday tips that can help you enjoy better and longer sex over time. Just like a long-term diet and workout plan, these everyday tips won’t help you tonight, but they’ll definitely give you sex god potential over time.

1. Masturbate regularly

If you haven’t ejaculated for a long time, it’ll be harder to hold on while having sex. Spend some alone time with yourself at least a few times a week so you never let the horniness get out of hand! This is one of the most fun ways to learn how to last longer in bed.

2. Controlled ejaculation

Now every guy masturbates now and then. But how often do you do it? If you have some time by yourself, get busy with the little guy, but don’t rush it.

Spend at least an hour watching porn or thinking naughty while masturbating.

But each time you’re on the verge of ejaculating, hold yourself back and think about something else. The more you practice holding back during masturbation, the better you’d get at controlling your ejaculation. [Read: What is edging? How to learn to edge and orgasm harder than ever]

3. Speak to your doctor

If you’re having a really difficult time making sex last, perhaps you need to speak with your doctor for an immediate temporary cure.

Your doctor can prescribe a few pills for you, which can help you last longer while you work on the other techniques at the same time.

But, don’t panic by reading this. Most guys struggle with not lasting every now and again. It doesn’t necessarily mean there’s anything wrong with you! You just need to try these tips for how to last longer in bed.

4. Workouts and kegels

Workout every day and you’ll feel a lot better in no time. Working out improves your blood flow and makes you feel fitter. And even if you lose an erection because you shot the gun too soon, you’ll be ready again in no time.

Another alternative is kegel exercises. Kegel exercises are a set of exercises that focus on the pelvic muscles. When you contract and relax the muscles around your pelvis, the pubococcygeus muscle of your pelvis gets stronger over time.

And that helps you get rock-hard erections, while giving you better control of your ejaculations. [Read: 25 surefire ways to motivate yourself to work out and stick to it]

5. Communication is key

Don’t let your early explosions frustrate you. After all, you’re not intentionally trying to finish yourself off early. Speak to your lover and help each other understand what’s going on in both of your minds.

She’s not going to be angry because sex ended a little sooner than usual. She just needs to know what’s going on.

6. Try to avoid overexcitement

Avoid aggressive or wild angry sex. When you lose control of your erection, that’s when you’d lose the erection completely.

Try to indulge in calm, slow and romantic sex. By avoiding fast and aggressive sex, you’d be able to last longer because you won’t experience a sudden burst of sexual energy in an instant. [Read: How to make out with a girl on the first date and make her love it]

7. Take control of the sex

When two people have sex, the one on top is usually in control of the movements. So try to spend more time on top. When you’re on top, you can slow down or stop moving completely when you feel like you’re on the verge of ejaculating.

By holding back when you feel like ejaculating, you can last a lot longer because you’re in control of the sex. This is a genius tip on how to last longer in bed because she won’t know what you’re trying to do! [Read: Sex tips for girls to ride a man and look sexy doing it]

8. Shift your weight

When you’re on top of your girl and feel like you’re going to blow out, place your forearms on either side of her and shift your body weight onto your arms. Stop moving in and out and just wait for your little guy to feel relaxed again. You’ll be able to push ahead within a few seconds.

9. Be in sync with your partner

This is where your lover can help you. If she ever feels you throbbing when you’re inside of her, tell her to avoid moving too aggressively *or even stop moving completely* so you can regain your control.

At times, as hard as you try, you do need some help from your woman to make sex last longer.

10. Control the surroundings

Have sex in a comfortable place where you won’t feel overexcited. Completely avoid anything that’s too exciting like public sex or anything else that turns you on a lot.

If you feel most relaxed in your bed, stick to the bedroom until you get better control of your orgasms. [Read: 7 sexiest types of sex you can ever have]

11. Don’t change the pace too often

Changing the pace of the to and fro motion when you’re inside her feels good for both of you. But when you do that, you’d also end up ejaculating faster because the change in pace makes you hornier.

Slow down and stick with the same rhythm for a while, before switching things up.

12. In and out

Some couples love taking the little guy out of the lady garage often and putting him back in while having sex. They do this in porn movies all the time too.

For many guys, taking the tool out often and reinserting it while having sex helps them stay hard for a lot longer. But at the same time, it’ll make some guys orgasm a lot faster.

Find out what works for you and use it to your benefit. As you can see, not all tips on how to last longer in bed suit everyone, it’s about finding what’s right for you. [Read: 25 things that turn a girl on sexually and otherwise when she sees a guy]

13. Shallow moves

Once you’ve penetrated your girl, don’t go ramming her like you’re a porn star on heat. Go shallow and easy.

Move just a few inches in and out of her, unless you’re feeling very confident, because longer and deeper moves of the shaft will excite your little guy a lot faster.

14. Wear a condom

Firstly, safe sex all the way. Secondly, wearing a condom numbs most guys down there a little. Don’t opt for ultra-thin condoms.

Instead, opt for ones that’ll help prevent you from ejaculating faster by numbing you down there. This is one of the quickest and easiest ways to learn how to last longer in bed. [Read: Condom types and how they can improve your sex life]

15. Relax and don’t obsess about your orgasm

One of the biggest reasons why so many guys suffer from this on a regular basis is because they spend so much time obsessing over this little problem of theirs.

These things happen to everyone all the time. And you’ll definitely get over it sometime soon. So until then, ignore the thought of premature ejaculation before or during sex by keeping your mind occupied elsewhere. Focusing on it too much will just make it worse. [Read: Real reasons why losing an erection bothers men so much]

16. Control your breathing

Breathing plays a big part in controlling your ejaculation. If you’re on the verge of ejaculation and want to hold it back, focus on your breathing and try to release your breath slowly through your mouth in a controlled manner when you’re inside her.

This is hard to explain in a sentence without going into details, but trust us, just breathe out through your mouth slowly and you’ll see how it works.

Before long, you’ll see this is one of the best ways to learn how to last longer in bed. [Read: A girl’s confession about sex with an uncircumcised man]

17. Masturbate before having sex

We mentioned masturbating more often, but this is a little different. In this case, you should masturbate before you’re going to have sex.

This is the easiest go-to technique that most guys know when it comes to how to last longer during sex. Masturbating an hour or so before you have sex lets you release that pent-up arousal that leads you to finishing quickly.

When a guy ejaculates, it releases endorphins which regulate your body’s functions to a more relaxed state giving you more control of your man parts.

Also, releasing that sexual energy through masturbation gives you time to build it up again through foreplay, making you last longer. [Read: Male masturbation techniques – 11 unique moves for max pleasure]

18. Avoid sexy, stimulating thoughts

It is natural to get caught in the moment during sex. The overall pleasure of being inside while seeing her sex face and hearing her moans can just be the minor trigger for you to prematurely orgasm.

As funny as it sounds, reducing this positive feedback by thinking unsexy stuff distracts you from the moment and makes you last longer than a minute or two.

Thinking unsexy thoughts disconnects the overload of sensations that flows from your penis to your brain preventing it from sending signals that urge you to orgasm. So next time, think of something heavy and serious like mathematics, rocket science, or your favorite dramatic movie moment to keep you from going off.

19. Change positions when you’re nearing ejaculation

Changing positions when you feel you’re almost there puts a brake on the urge to ejaculate. Not only that it’s unassuming under the ruse that you simply want to switch positions.

The need to move around takes your mind off the heat of the moment calming your raging boner back to its working level. [Read: Average time for sex – How long we want vs. how long we last]

20. Focus on long foreplay

Most would think that this is a bad idea since foreplay only serves to get you heated up for the fight. However, if you focus more on long foreplay, it creates the opposite effect.

Having a long foreplay session allows you to focus your mind on another task other than getting an orgasm from intercourse. It lessens your chance to blow your load quickly, compared to if you do it after a short foreplay session.

It will also help your partner orgasm much faster too. In that case, it’s one of the most pleasurable ways to learn how to last longer during sex. [Read: How to foreplay: The key for the best sex of your life]

21. The squeeze

The “squeeze” is a little trick where you press on either the base of your penis or on your perineum *the patch of skin between the scrotum and anus* when you feel you’re about to come.

This trick produces variable results but helps you to reduce the urge to ejaculate. It will not work the first time around, so practice finding the right spot to put pressure on.

22. Desensitizing agents

Desensitizing agents are drugs that function as a temporary anesthetic by numbing the area to which they are applied. Originally developed for military and athletic first aid use, these topical drugs take the form of creams, gels, and aerosol sprays.

Apply them to your penis to let you “take control” of the situation. Use according to the right dosage though or you might lose sensation from your wiener altogether.

23. Speak to your doctor about Viagra

AKA, the blue pill. This somewhat expensive medication serves as the last resort if you really want to last like a male porn star. Though neither we nor the ladies recommend 40+ minutes of sexual action.

Viagra is a formulation that serves to keep you erect and partially numb down there to be able to do the job. However, it does come with side effects. Consult your doctor before using. [Read: Limp penis to rocket shaft – 20 ways to fix it as a couple]

24. Get a good night’s rest

If you really want to learn how to last longer in bed, you need to sleep! It sounds like a cop out answer but if you recall your previous sexual encounters that happened at different times of the day, you’ll agree that sex is better and longer if you are well-rested.

That’s why early morning sex is more fun and fulfilling than drunk, after-work sex. Get that full sleep and store up stamina to be able to last longer in bed.

25. Avoid alcohol before sex

Yes, alcohol numbs down the senses, gives you the courage to ask her out, creates that beer-goggle worldview, but it also reduces your performance.

You lose control over your man parts, and it reduces your stamina so badly that you barely make it to the second round. If you want to learn how to last longer in bed, avoid alcohol and just focus on the moment. [Read: Alcohol’s effects on sex and your libido]

26. Build up your stamina

This includes a proper diet and lots of cardio and exercise. Exercise builds your stamina which allows you to go on all through that humping without breaking into a sweat. Not only that, it also makes you physically attractive and fit to pull off all those level five difficulty Kamasutra positions.

As mentioned, sex is a physical activity and a fit body is likely to function better during sex than an overweight or overly lanky one. If you want to learn how to last longer during sex and be healthier in general, this is the best tip around.

27. Make sure you’re relaxed and in a good mood before sex

People get less enthusiastic about sexual action if they’re worrying or feeling bothered by something. Negative emotions and stress can decrease libido and performance anxiety during sex.

Meditation, listening to relaxing music, or even just doing an activity that’s personally enjoyable helps put your mental state in equilibrium which contributes to longer-lasting sex. [Read: 24 sex tips for men and secrets to make her wet and want more]

28. Think unsexy thoughts just before penetration

This is an old and simple trick that allows you to buy some precious minutes during sex. Thinking of anything unsexy during the act lessens your level of arousal delaying you from reaching the point of orgasm quickly.

It’s best done just before penetration because it reduces excitement and therefore immediate sensitivity. Just don’t overdo it! You might lose your erection if you go too far.

29. Try performance-enhancing supplements

There’s a wide variety of performance-enhancing supplements out there with wild claims to their effectiveness. But even if the supposed effects are true or your body is just being tricked by the placebo effect, there is no harm in soliciting the help of performance-enhancing supplements to make sex last longer.

Most of these sexual-enhancing products are mostly made up of stimulants that prolong stamina or chemical derivatives that mimic the effects Viagra. Again, be sure to check with your doctor before you attempt this. [Read: How long should sex really last? The real score]

30. Avoid taking drugs

Various drugs have negative effects on a man’s sexual performance. When taken before sex, it can cause erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, and decreased libido. Long-term use has even worse effects on a man’s overall performance.

If you want to learn how to last longer during sex, cut out the drugs – unless they’ve been specifically prescribed to you by your doctor.

In fact, if you want to be healthier and not put your life at risk, stop taking drugs you’re not supposed to take. We really shouldn’t have to say it, should we? [Read: Alcohol’s effect on sex and your libido]

31. Quit smoking

Just like drugs and alcohol, smoking decreases the quality of sexual performance of males and females alike. Smoking harms the blood vessels in the penis decreasing the blood flow during erection eventually causing decreased sex time.

The longer the time you have spent smoking, the more noticeable the effects on your sexual prowess. Quitting smoking will not only improve your overall health but will also make sex last longer

32. Take breaks during penetration

Taking breaks, especially if you’re nearing climax, will help stifle the arousal for more action later on.

Use your break to do more foreplay, catch a breather, or to tease your partner so that they’ll be more excited for the big finale moments later. It’s one of the best ways to learn how to last longer in bed.

33. Try edging

Edging is a technique where a man ceases penetrative action moments before orgasm. His arousal reverts back to its pre-climax stage, giving him more time for penetration.

If you are capable of doing this multiple times during sex, you’ll extend the action for a longer period of time. Additionally, edging makes the final release more pleasurable and explosive than usual. [Read: How to use edging to make orgasming even better]

34. Focus on comfortable positions

Sometimes both partners tire easily because of a difficult sex position. To reduce this fatigue, switch to a more relaxed sex position that won’t make sex feel like a workout. It’s the fastest way to learn how to last longer in bed.

Positions such as the spoon, the cross, and the sitting positions are known for being comfortable and lessening the physical strain when using other difficult sex positions too.

[Read: How to make spoon sex hotter than any other position]

Yes, it’s true that premature ejaculation is frustrating and demeaning. But use these tips on how to last longer in bed during sex and you may just be able to turn your life around and have a great sex life with just a little effort!

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Vinod Srinivas Serai
Vin Serai
Vin Serai is the founder of LovePanky.com, and has delved deep into the working of love and relationships for almost two decades. Having dipped his feet in almo...