Maybe you’ve heard your boyfriend say, “you’re giving me blue balls.” But what are blue balls really, and how does it feel when a guy experiences it?
The term blue balls gets thrown around a lot in conversation and usually goes hand-in-hand with a guy uncomfortably readjusting his balls. When I first heard the term blue balls, I was intrigued. Wait, so they turn blue? Your balls look like Papa Smurf? All these questions, yet no one wanted to give me any answers for what are blue balls. Fair enough, I mean the whole Papa Smurf thing was probably a tad too visual for them.
What are blue balls?
Whether you have balls or you’re a partner of someone who has balls, you probably want to know what are blue balls. First thing I can tell you is that this is no myth. Blue balls are here and they’re not going anywhere anytime soon. So, let’s get down to business and expand your mind with the knowledge of blue balls.
This is a great topic for dinner.
#1 What are blue balls? You should probably know that, no, the testicles do not actually turn blue. When I found this out, I was also disappointed. What blue balls actually are is the result of a prolonged state of sexual arousal.
When a man is turned on, blood flows through his penis, giving him an erection. Blood also flows through the testicles which cause them to swell. If he doesn’t ejaculate, the pressure builds up causing him to feel discomfort. [Read: 14 strange, interesting facts about sex you didn’t know]
#2 Are they harmful? If you experience blue balls, don’t think that your dick is going to fall off. Blue balls are not going to damage your health. They cause you some discomfort and varying states of pain, but you don’t have to worry about any long-term health conditions associated with blue balls.
#3 Why are they called blue balls? Good question. The balls don’t actually look like blueberries but the term is derived from the theory that the scrotum has a blueish tinge after sexual arousal. “Blue balls” also is associated with the feeling of the testicles feeling bruised.
#4 You don’t need to see a doctor. If you think your blue balls need medical attention, you’re just freaking out. The medical community doesn’t really care about your blue balls. Over time, your balls calm down on their own.
The only time you should see a doctor for it is if you experience serious pain in your testicular region. You’ll notice when you’re experiencing more pain than just blue balls, trust me *note: I don’t have balls*. [Read: 11 health reasons why sex is painful for men]
#5 Who do blue balls effect? Of course, they affect the person who has the balls. This is a given. But mainly young teenage men suffer from blue balls. There’s a pretty good reason why: young men get aroused the easiest. Sorry guys, but all that fresh testosterone in you is to blame.
#6 Few men experience this. That’s right. If you experience blue balls or have a partner with blue balls, well, you just lived to see a rare event. Very few men actually experience this. Consider this to be a bonding moment between you and your partner.
#7 This isn’t an excuse for sex. Listen, if you’re a lady who’s thinking some guy is using blue balls as an excuse for sex, well, that guy has some problems. Blue balls are actually quite painful, so, don’t think that he’s making it up.
Now that you know what are blue balls, it’s time you learned how to get rid of them.
#1 Masturbate. I said it once and I’ll say it again, masturbation is the key to happiness. Okay, I never actually said that, but I’m saying it now.
If you experience blue balls, the most efficient way to relieve yourself from the pressure and pain is to rub one out. It may take you a while longer than usual to ejaculate but it’s well worth the extra time.
#2 Cold compress. Sometimes you can’t masturbate. You want to but if your parents are around or your roommate is home, it’s not so easy. Instead, use a cold compress which plays the role of acting as non-adrenaline. Non-adrenaline is the hormone released after you orgasm. With the cold compress, it constricts the blood vessels and lowers the blood flow to your testicles.
#3 Workout. Who wants to exercise when they have blue balls? I know, you don’t want to, but if you can’t use a cold compress or jerk off, well, your options are limited. But by pumping weights or trying to jog, you’ll get the blood flowing away from your testicles. [Read: Female blue balls – Blue beans and the search for answers]
#4 Lift something heavy. Bring out your inner Arnold and lift some heavy objects. It may seem weird to you, but lifting heavy object causes Valsalva Manuever. This is the feeling you get in your lower stomach when you lift weights. What happens is that it changes your blood pressure and relieves it from your testicles. Not bad, right?[Read: More blue balls secrets and tips every guy and girl’s gotta know]
#5 Wait it out. This one is probably the most painful way to get rid of blue balls, but sometimes you literally have no other options. You can’t go jerk off at your engagement dinner, no way. You just have to wait it out.
But blue balls do go away after some time. How much time? Well, that depends on your balls, not on me. But word on the street is that they typically go away in about an hour’s time.