Are we hypocrites? Or are we just idiots? We say money can’t buy love, but yet, we’re disappointed when we’re not getting any bling. So are you an idiot or are enlightened enough to see past the veil of hypocrisy in love?
Click here to read the introduction on money can buy happiness in love, the three stages in love and how money can affect it.
The myth – Money can’t buy love
Everyone wants to be pampered. When we were little kids, do you remember the time you wanted that expensive Barbie with all the works or that remote controlled glider?
Yeah, we cried, ranted, and begged our parents till they got us one of those bling things!
As we grow up, we sober down our rants and grow up to become good, responsible adults.
But when we start dating someone, we expect our lovers to pamper us just like we were pampered as little diaper-wearers.
Love and the bright side
Unknowingly, we bring out the inner child in us. Not completely though. Just a wee bit.
On your fifth anniversary, when you get back home after a wonderful drive around town, or after splurging on an expensive dinner surrounded by interfering Mariachis, your heart may be beating inside, wondering if there’s a present waiting for you.
You didn’t get the gift at the restaurant, so it must be at home.
But if you find nothing at home, your heart deflates a bit but it soon goes back to normal mode in a minute. No big deal. Both of you love each other and have splurged a lot on the date. It’s really not necessary to splurge any more. You’re a happy couple. And after all, is there a greater gift than the perfect love you both share?
Money raises its head
A few days later, when one of your cute couple friends celebrate their anniversary, and come by to meet you at your place, with a sparking diamond necklace or a brand new car, whether you like it or not, you’re going to turn green with envy. This is when I say, ‘Welcome to the twisted world of money and love!’
You’re totally fine with not getting anything flashy on your anniversary, but somewhere down there, you’re feeling let down and a wee bit annoyed that you weren’t given a bling gift by your partner.
Does money really matter in love? Wouldn’t you feel jealous if your friend enjoyed a better bling bling relationship than you? Wouldn’t you hate it if your friend goes away on a fancy vacation every few months to celebrate another of their annoying anniversaries? And won’t you ever compare your partner with someone else who seems to be leading the good life?
People say money can’t buy love, but is it really true? Perhaps, money can’t buy love. But money can definitely buy great memories, magical moments and fabulous gifts, which in turn can make good ol’ love look bad in front of bling love. Bling love is more fun, more enjoyable, luxurious and quite frankly, a perfect piece of heaven!
Idiots and money matters in love
We can pretend like it’s no big deal, but as a matter of fact, it does make a difference, even if it’s not going to be such a big deal that it could end your relationship.
We live in a wealth hungry world. So if you’re not going to flatter the pants off your mate every now and then with little happy remembrances of love (by splurging money, of course), it’s only a matter of time before they feel let down and start wondering if you care about them in the first place. Why do you think an engagement ring should cost roughly around the same as two months of the guy’s salary?
Rich gifts also matter depending upon the friends your partner hangs out with. If you want to be respected and better yet, ‘fancied’ by all of your partner’s friends, you need to give gifts that are as good as, or even better, than the ones they get from their respective mates.
That way, you’re on top spot. Your sweetie’s friends talk about you like you’re some demigod, and your lover would feel really appreciated too. And hey, isn’t that what love is all about once we get past the outer squeaky clean surface? Appreciation and desirability. [Read: Money management for couples]
Equating love with money
I know it’s disgusting to weigh love and money on a scale, but that’s the way we humans are. If you think you aren’t one who’d appreciate or fall for a big diamond, or a Rolls Royce, you should be really happy about yourself.
But I doubt there’s anyone in this world who’d see a big precious stone or a car in the morning and sob with grief and anger! Unless it’s your money that was used, and you’re flat broke now. [Quiz: How far will you go for success]
So, what’s the point? You want to keep your sweet pea happy, then let them know you appreciate them and also let their friends know! It makes all the difference in a successful loving relationship.
After all, we all want number one, and nobody likes to be with the second best!
Money, love and circumstances
You don’t have to pamper your mate all the time nor should you expect your mate to splurge on you every other day. And most importantly, it depends upon how much you make and how much you splurge on yourself. If you find yourself picking up your third pair of Louis Vuitton shoes while on a shopping spree, but forget or overlook picking a fancy something for your lover, then you’re just being pathetic, and totally unappreciative. That’s definitely when you need to think ‘money can buy love!’
If you can’t afford it, then it’s completely acceptable. Just as long as your lover knows you, and doesn’t waver into another person’s favor just because they’re pampering your partner more than you are.
This usually happens with women. When another guy shows a lot of affection, flattery and splurges money on her, she’d go footloose and flip for the new charmer, unless her guy is a charmer himself, who can still woo her back, every single day. How would I know? Well, because I’m a woman who gets charmed all the time, and I’ve got a guy who’s the biggest charmer in the world!
Life is messy, isn’t it, when you need bling or a lot of charm and wooing skills to keep relationships alive? [Read: What matters most in long term relationships?]
But that’s the way love works, with little tweaks in evolution through the ages. You figure the options, you’ve got two people who love you a lot, and one of them pampers you all the time, charms you, and cushions you with holidays, gifts, dinner dates and happiness, while the other doesn’t do much, even if that person has the wealth and capability to do all that. Whom would you prefer? Yeah, that’s right. Even if you’re already involved, love gives you a second chance, and money plays the catalyst.
The real truth – Money can buy love
We all have a habit of shoving unpleasant conversations into a big black garbage bag, hoping never to see it again. It’s all perfect and clean as long as the garbage stays tight. But a couple of days later, the stench stifles your nose. The same goes with love.
We expect love to conquer mountains and cross seas, but in reality, all love can do is shower you with happiness, understanding and joy. The rest, is up to you, and how you and your lover help each other and understand that love can keep you happy together, but money and celebrations are what can keep the spark and affection alive. So go on and celebrate your love. Bling in love!
So are you an idiot who thinks money can’t buy love or are you a wise know-it-all who always knew the importance of money in love? But we have to remember this though, the world may revolve around money, but it’s love that makes the world go around. So what’s more important? That’s your call!
We’re trying hard to create better relationships in the world.
But we can’t do it without YOU!
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