If you’re not sure what being homoromantic means or you think you may be this sexuality, here’s how to understand this unique type of love.
With all the different sexualities being discovered all the times, it’s difficult to keep up if you’re not immersed in that world. That being said, it’s really important to learn how other people feel so you can understand their lives a bit better. Being homoromantic is just one of the many sexualities you’ll see out there.
What is homoromantic?
You probably know what homosexuality is. It’s when a person is sexually attracted to their own gender. Homoromantic is similar in the sense that it means someone is attracted to another person of their own gender. The difference, however, is that it’s related to romantic feelings specifically.
Now, there are people who use homosexual as a term that means you are attracted to your same gender in all ways, but that’s not completely accurate. That’s because there are people out there who are only sexually attracted to their own gender while they don’t feel romantically for them. [Read: How many different kinds of romantic orientation is there?]
Understanding what it means to be homoromantic
Those who are homoromantic can feel sexual attraction to their same gender but this term is typically used when they only feel romantically for them. Meaning, if someone is asexual but they have romantic feelings for their own gender, they’d be homoromantic.
This is also the case for people who might be heterosexual but find themselves having romantic feelings for their same gender only. If you’re curious about what it means to be homoromantic, we have some inside knowledge.
#1 You can be heterosexual and still want to date someone of your own gender. It’s the whole idea of being able to have romantic feelings for someone of the same sex. You just might not want to get naked with them. Many people who later realize they’re homoromantic often have trouble with their sexual identity simply because of their own confusion.
They feel a physical and sexual attraction to the opposite sex but see themselves married to and in a romantic relationship with someone of the same sex. The truth is, you can be both. [Read: 16 myths and truths about aromantics]
#2 This term is used most often with asexuals. This is mostly because many asexuals can and still do have romantic relationships. Just because they don’t want to get frisky with someone doesn’t mean they don’t want that love connection.
This is used mainly with asexual individuals because it explains being gay or being a lesbian, just without the sex. If you’re a woman who wants to date only women but doesn’t want to get intimate with them physically, you’re homoromantic.
#3 Wanting a romantic relationship is not the same as wanting a sexual one. Many people think of the word relationship as an all-encompassing thing. If you’re in a relationship with someone, you want to have sex with them and be emotionally intimate.
But there are people out there who only want one or the other. In the case of homoromantic individuals, they want all the lovey dovey feels and the emotional ties of a relationship without the sex. This is still considered a real and valid relationship. [Read: How to understand who you really are as a biromantic or bisexual]
#4 You can ONLY want romance with someone without the sex. Other people might think it’s impossible to want to be romantically involved with someone without wanting to get naked and touch each other.
This is obviously not true. Many people are only interested in romance. Many asexual people still want romantic relationships, whether that be with the opposite gender or the same.
#5 Being in a solely romantic relationship while being sexually active with someone else is still cheating. Some might not understand this but being unfaithful in pretty much any way is still considered cheating.
Just because someone isn’t sexually attracted to a certain person but is still in a romantic relationship with them doesn’t mean they can still have sex with someone else. Unless that’s an understood dynamic of your relationship, it’s still cheating. [Read: The debate on cheating and confessing]
#6 Many often date other homoromantics. This is mostly because in this case, sex is off the table. Usually, this is between couples who are asexual and homoromantic. They both understand each other’s wants and needs and it makes the relationship work out better.
Those who try to date a homoromantic might not fully understand it and that can cause them to have problems with their sex life. For that reason, relationships between homoromantics is common along with relationships between asexual homoromantic individuals.
#7 The relationship focuses on bonding and emotional connections. While all relationships should have these characteristics, it’s the main purpose for homoromantic couples. Since there isn’t a focus on sexual activities, the couple focuses on remaining fully emotionally connected.
#8 You can still have a loving, healthy family. Just because someone is homoromantic doesn’t mean they don’t want a family. They can still get married and even adopt or have children of their own. Their sexuality makes relatively no difference in their life when it comes to family.
#9 You can still date those who are homosexual. So long as someone wants a romantic relationship with them and the feeling is mutual, they can be together. Just because homoromantic individuals aren’t interested in sex doesn’t mean all of them choose not to partake.
Sometimes they’ll fall in love with someone who loves them but also wants to do naughty things with them. It’s really a judgment call on their part and something they discuss when being together.
#10 It’s just a part of who you are. Being homoromantic isn’t a big deal. It just means that’s the way you are. Nothing else about your life will change other than you realizing there’s a reason you’re not romantically attracted to those you want to get naked with and you want to be with those you’re not interested in sexually. Otherwise, it’s just a part of who you are.
Being homoromantic is about finding someone you connect with romantically and on a deeper emotional level. Understanding what being homoromantic is can help you see just how complex human desires really are.
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Bella is a lifestyle writer, cheese enthusiast (Wisconsin native over here) and fantasy adventure author-in-progress who enjoys all things love, dog, p...