When it comes to moving back in with parents, you’re probably less than thrilled. Here’s when you need to and how to stay sane around them.
You love your parents. They gave you life and raised you to be who you are today. That being said, you may not want to live with them anymore. While they may have been great growing up, you don’t want them prying into your life at every turn. However, sometimes moving back in with parents is what you need.
Things don’t always go as planned in life. And that means you may need to move back in with your parents while you get stuff figured out. That’s perfectly fine. Many people end up back with their parents in order to regain some footing in life. Is it time for you to move back in?
How to know when you should move back in with parents
It can be really hard to admit when you need help. And when it comes to moving in with your parents, you do it because you’re struggling in some way. Here’s how you can determine if it’s time to call up the ‘rents and ask to stay. [Read: All the ways interfering parents can affect your love life]
#1 You’re financially struggling. If you can’t afford to live on your own, going back home might be your best option. More likely than not, your parents won’t make you pay for anything other than your food and fun. That means you’ll easily be able to save up money for a place of your own.
#2 Your health has taken a decline. Sometimes unfortunate things happen to our health. You may not always be able to function without your parents or someone else to take care of you. When your parents are the only ones who can, it’s your only option.
#3 You just broke up with your partner. Living with a significant other can get messy when it’s time to split up. You may not be able to find a place right away and staying with your now ex is NOT an option.
#4 You can’t stay anywhere else. Many people would rather couch surf for a while than end up moving back in with parents. While that’s a great idea, it’s just not always possible. If your parents’ home is a last resort, you just have to take it.
#5 Your mental health is unstable. It’s not just your physical health that can be off. If you’re struggling mentally, you may not be able to live alone. Being alone can often make certain mental illnesses worse. So while you work to get better, moving back in with parents is the best idea for you. [Read: 5 ways volunteer work can help heal depression]
How to survive moving back in with parents
Even though you love them and get along during holiday visits, you probably don’t want to live with them again. You now have to abide by their rules and that can be frustrating and cause a lot of tension. Here’s how to make your stay a little less strenuous.
#1 Follow their rules. It is their house, after all. As much as you might hate some of their rules, you have to abide by them. Disobeying will only make things worse for the both of you.
#2 But make sure they know you’re an adult. Basically, you have to set some ground rules right away. Tell them you’ll abide by their rules so long as they respect the fact that you’re not a teenager anymore.
It can be easy for parents to revert to the same place they were in mentally when you moved out. Their baby is home! They’ll be overjoyed for sure, but they’ll also want to tell you what to do. Stick to those boundaries and make sure they realize you make your own choices now.
#3 Avoid bringing dates home. This is a major no-no when you live with your parents – especially if it’s a temporary situation. Out of respect for them, just go to your date’s place if you want to get it on.
There’s nothing worse than waking up in the middle of the night to your child having sex with a date. Or coming downstairs the next morning to find a stranger in your home. Never bring dates home for your parents’ sake. [Read: How to date when you still live with your parents]
#4 Keep your head down. Basically, just do your thing. Go to work, hang out with friends, come home. Do everything you’d do in your own home, just keep it contained to the room you’re staying in at your parents’.
This is, by far, the best way to keep things civil when you move back in with your parents. You’ll just go through life as normal. The only difference will be who you roommates are.
#5 Stay out of their business. Just like you want them to leave you and your business alone, do the same for them. They have a life now outside of their home and that means you have to keep your nose out of it.
Even if they argue or have other things going on, unless your opinion was asked, keep it to yourself. This helps avoid altercations and a lot of arguments. But you also want to at least talk to them.
#6 Work on getting out of there ASAP. You’re not supposed to live with your parents after a certain amount of time. You’ve been on your own for a while and it’s going to be uncomfortable and even annoying to be there.
For the sake of the relationship you have with your parents, get out sooner. They don’t like having their life interrupted just as much as you don’t like having to move back in. They’re just too nice to say so. [Read: 9 important habits you need to be more independent]
#7 Just communicate. Be open and talk to them. If you’re not happy with how they’re treating you while living there, speak up. It’s better to get that stuff out in the open right away versus waiting until you move out and then not speaking to them.
They won’t understand why and it’ll just make things uncomfortable. Talk to them and communicate what’s going on in your life. Update them on when you think you’ll be able to move out and just get on with it.