It’s normal to be a little insecure at times but if your lack of confidence is crushing your life, it’s a problem. Here’s how to be more confident.
The older you get, the more confident you are. That’s how it’s supposed to work, anyway. But sometimes that’s not always reality and, as adults, we have to learn how to be more confident when life gest us down. Because there are many aspects of life that do get us down.
You may have been insecure as a teen and then confident at some point and then lost all of it due to something that happened. You may also be someone who has never really had that confidence to begin with.
And maybe you’re just someone who wants to gain even more confidence than you already have. No matter what your reason for wanting to learn how to be more confident, you can still do the same simple daily tasks that form into self-loving habits.
Without self-love, your life will be a lot harder
When we’re not happy with who we are, things tend to get rough. We don’t think we deserve a great partner, we don’t go for that promotion at work, and we end up missing out on great opportunities. Life is just easier and better when you can learn to love yourself as a whole. [Read: How to discover self-love and happiness]
How to be more confident with some simple habits
Once you get the hang of these, they’ll be very simple. Getting started, however, is a little more difficult than you’d like. The problem with a lack of confidence is that it can happen very easily but it’s hard to build back up. These tips and ways to learn how to be more confident are your best bet for getting to a place of full security.
#1 Think more positively all the time. Being confident isn’t just about exuding an air of, “I’m great.” It’s about being positive even when you don’t feel awesome about yourself. In order to do that, you have to force yourself to see the bright side more often.
#2 Focus on bettering the aspects you don’t like. If there are key things that make you unhappy with yourself and you can do something about them, then work on it. Go to the gym if you’re overweight or out of shape. Focus on bettering your drive and ambition if you feel lazy and unfulfilled.
Not only does working on yourself actually make you more confident, but eventually those things will be great and you won’t feel insecure anymore. It just takes time of doing this every day.
#3 Look at your life from a new perspective. Oftentimes, we feel bad about ourselves or our lives because we lack perspective. Your life might actually be amazing in someone else’s eyes. Make a point to think about all you have from an outsider’s perspective and you might feel a lot better.
#4 Be grateful for the things you have. Many of us feel insecure because we don’t have the things we want. Whether that’s a specific job, or a certain lip shape, or a nice home, wanting what we don’t have often makes us feel back about what we do have.
And that’s very toxic. When you stop recognizing the great things in your life, insecurity takes over. If you take a step back and look at the amazing thing you do have, you’ll feel a lot better about yourself and your life. [Read: 20 things to remember to be grateful for]
#5 Eat well and live healthily. Your body deserves better. Chances are, if you’re not very confident, you probably aren’t treating the problem from the inside out. You may not feel great about yourself and instead of trying to fix it, you just pig out and feel worse.
Try adopting a healthy lifestyle. Your body reacts to what you put in it and how you treat it. If you’re not eating well or giving yourself exercise, you won’t feel good about yourself.
#6 Write in a journal. I know it sounds lame, but there’s a reason it’s suggested as a means of coping. Jot down your insecurities and read it back when you’re done. Sometimes you can learn a lot just by looking over your thoughts in a physical form. Plus, it can even help you see how silly some things are. [Read: How to be happy and live life to the fullest]
#7 Do it anyways. We often get insecure and then stop doing stuff we love or that we know will be good for us. But those are the things that make you happy! And when you’re happier, you feel better about yourself naturally. So even if it’s hard, still do the stuff you know you like.
#8 Boost yourself up. Yes, give yourself some pep talks. It’s perfectly fine to talk to yourself to feel better. Reassuring yourself of how amazing you are does actually work. It rewires your brain to think those things and the more you say it, the more you’ll think it regularly.
#9 Shut down negative thoughts and ramblings. This is probably going to be the hardest thing to do but it will make the biggest difference. Every single day, make it a habit to shut down bad thoughts about yourself. Stop your thought-process and replace it with positives. Doing this regularly will rewire your brain to choose positive thoughts as a default. [Read: How to stop negative thoughts that drag you down]
#10 Do something that scares you. If there’s one thing that makes us more confident, it’s conquering a fear. No matter if it’s talking to that cute barista about more than just your order to wearing those bright pink boots you think are too edgy for you, it’ll help you feel more confident. Just do it and don’t think about it.
#11 Talk to friends about it. Believe it or not, your friends might know exactly what you’re talking about. Even the ones who seem to love themselves to the end could have insecurity issues you don’t even consider. And the best thing? They could offer sound advice and even help lift your spirits. [Read: 8 types of friends everyone needs in their life]
#12 Listen to feel-good music. First thing in the morning, turn on some music that makes you feel amazing. Better yet, create a playlist you can listen to while you get ready. Starting your day off on a positive note can do more for our self-esteem than you realize. Avoid sad songs and choose upbeat, happy songs that make you want to sing along.
Knowing how to be more confident is all about staying positive, highlighting your strengths, and accepting what you can’t change. Use these daily tips to build up that confidence and you’ll feel great in no time.
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Bella is a lifestyle writer, cheese enthusiast (Wisconsin native over here) and fantasy adventure author-in-progress who enjoys all things love, dog, p...