A newborn in your life can give you a lot of happiness, but it can also distance the husband and wife and strain their relationship by a great deal.
Giving birth to a newborn may be the most ecstatic moment, and your little bundle of joy may give you all the love and happiness you need. But what happens to the relationship between a husband and a wife when they have no couple time anymore? Here’s a guide to retain that spark in your love life, even after your child is born.
Where’s my Wife?
“Excuse me, but did you see my wife?” is what most new fathers feel like asking that sleep deprived, unkempt woman who doesn’t even seem to register his arrival. He seems dazed with the new avatar that his sweetheart has taken on and the usurping of his position by this new arrival.
Who is this Guy?
“Who is this guy?” New mothers seem to be asking themselves of their husbands who don’t seem to be able to be doing anything right, what with waking up the baby with their roaring bikes and revving cars, or their incapacity to do anything quietly even as she moves around the house stealthily with Red Indian precision. His incomprehension or standoffishness makes her even more withdrawn or contemptuous.
Overhaul your Relationship
Studies and surveys have proved that the child’s preschool years are the most taxing in a marriage. Seeds of marital discord tend to crop up during this demanding time and if neglected they can swamp you, which is why you have to weed them out before it’s too late.
Strange but true, a tiny baby in the house can really overhaul your relationship, but with good relationship building habits in place and a little planning, you can enrich your relationship and make it a highly rewarding and productive one.
Do it Together
Doing things together will go a long way in strengthening the bonds between father, mother and child. Cuddling together in bed in the morning, having breakfast together, going for a stroll or for a drive, visiting the park, friends or family are some of the many things you can do together with your growing baby.
Having an offspring can trigger the nurturing capacity in many fathers but even if it doesn’t, fear not because it can be acquired. Though it is normal for the mother to take on the nurturing role of the primary care giver, it is essential that both of you take turns whenever possible in feeding, grooming, entertaining or nurturing your child to give your partner that much needed break. Not only will this help in bonding with the new arrival, but will give your partner more time and energy to spend on you.
It might be difficult, but it is important that you take help. Having different generations under the same roof might have its own deterrents but then again, the benefits far outweigh them. Turn to family members and in-laws (grandparents will only be too happy) to lend a hand as the best possible option along with the services of reliable paid help, but if that isn’t available and (if you can afford it) avail the services of a trustworthy babysitter for a couple of hours.