How to Charm a Girl and Flatter Her Into Liking You


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how to charm a girl

Every guy wants to know how to charm a girl into liking him. But many fail in their pursuit because they don’t know the five things to know to charm a girl. Find out what those five things are, and how to use them to your advantage.

Want to know how to charm a girl? You may have seen some guy chatting with a girl, and the girl laughing in delight and calling him a charmer. Sounds nice, doesn’t it?

Being complimented as a charmer by a girl is one of the best compliments any guy can ever get from a girl. It’s not about looks, it’s not about your physique or your geek quotient.

It’s purely your wit and how amazing you are at charming a girl.

How to charm a girl

So what exactly is charming a girl? Charming a girl isn’t about flirting with her or touching her in places.

You’d know you’re charming a girl when you make her feel so happy she could kiss you right there!

It’s a pretty good thing, isn’t it? Being a charmer?

We’ll tell you the five really important things you need to know to charm your way into a girl’s heart. You can exchange a lot of looks and share an intense eye contact with a girl, but you can’t charm her with that.

To charm a girl, you need to create an impression beyond looks and your swagger.

If you want to know how to charm a girl, firstly, it all starts with a conversation. And it pretty much ends there.

Charming a girl is all about how you communicate with her and make her feel happy and glad. Use these five tips and you’ll get there even before you know it! [Read: How to get a girl to like you]

Converse about what she likes

You may think this is unnecessary. Most guys do. Most guys wonder why they have to talk only about something a girl likes. Why can’t girls talk about what a guy likes too?

Of course, girls can. Girls do take an active interest in trying to get to know what guys like to talk about too. But at times, especially when you’re trying to make an impression, it’s always better to be aware of what’s going on in a girl’s mind. Now talking about what a girl likes doesn’t really mean couture, diamonds or cosmetics. The bridge between girls and guys has narrowed down a lot these days. It’s really easy to have an interesting conversation without breaking into a sweat. Stay away from tech reviews, calculations and sports and you should be fine. [Read: How to talk to a girl to have the perfect first conversation]

Flatter her

When you talk to a girl, it’s easy to get her talking back to you. But that’s not enough. If you want to know how to charm a girl, you need to make her feel comfortable, and yet, let her know you’re interested in her.

Friends don’t charm each other’s pants off. So if you’re going to talk to her like a friend, she may think you’re a great guy. But she won’t think you’re a charming guy. To be seen as a charming guy in a girl’s eyes, she needs to see you as a dating potential. And to do that, you need to flatter her.

Don’t go saying yawn inspiring things like ‘you look beautiful’, ‘you’re so pretty’, or something along those lines. It’s too boring and so-not-genuine. Instead, be vaguely specific when you compliment her. She’s got a new hairdo? Say something like “You look really cute today. Is that a new hairstyle?” Cute is a nice word to use because men hardly ever use that word. So when you do use it, she knows how much you mean it. [Read: How to ask a girl out *for the shy guy*]

Don’t say “Is that a new hairstyle? Gosh, those hair extensions really do wonders to your eyes. It’s gorgeous.” That makes you sound like her hair stylist or her gay best friend.

By flattering her, you can do three things with one line. You can warm her up and make her smile. You can make her realize that you find her pretty. And thirdly, you can let her know that you find her attractive. All of which you need to do to make her look at you as a dating potential.

Be funny

Now that you’ve got her all smiling with a good flow of flattery and great conversations, it’s time to get into her personal space. All of us have personal spaces and we feel very uncomfortable when someone steps into it unless we’re comfortable with them. To make her feel comfortable, you’ve got to make her have a good time with you. Now we can’t really tell you how to make a girl laugh. But we can give you two pointers to help you. Don’t tell her any jokes. Be happy when you talk to her.

Sounds vague? Firstly, telling jokes straight out of a book is stupid. Instead, tell her about a funny *real or made-up* incident she can relate too. [Read: What to talk about when you meet a girl]

And be happy when you talk to her if you want to charm her. When you’re happy, the whole world smiles with you! If you’re smiling and feeling happy, she’d smile back and be happy too. But if you’re nervous, you’d definitely make her feel uncomfortable.

Flirt with her

Guys flirt with girls all the time, but sometimes, a girl can think a flirty guy is creepy. So don’t overdo your flirting skills and gross her out. One of the best ways to start flirting is by being casual. Ask her what she does on weekends or after work, ask her about her favorite hangouts and restaurants, and just about anything that can be remotely personal. She’d know you’re hitting on her because no one really asks all these questions otherwise.

And out of the blue, pop this question.

“Hey, this is personal, but do you have a boyfriend? If you do, my heart’s just going to shatter into a million pieces right now!” Corny, yes. But it always works its magic!

She will laugh, but this line gets your intentions across straight, and she’d know you’re interested in her. But don’t make things awkward by pausing after she answers the question. Go on talking about something else like that question meant nothing to you. Your intentions will be made clear, and yet, you wouldn’t make her feel uncomfortable around you. [Read: How to tell if a girl likes you]

Touch her

This is dangerous ground, but something you need to learn. You do want to know how to charm a girl, right? So touching her at the right time completes the five pointers you need to know about how to charm a girl. If you get this right, you’ve obviously made a great impression.

Now touching a girl is like playing with fire. Too quick a touch and you don’t feel the warmth. Too long a linger, and heck, you’ll burn! See how dangerous it can be?

You can send a tingle up her spine with a simple touch if you’ve warmed her up already. But remember this. Touch her only if there’s a reason to touch her, like touching her ear lobe when you’re complimenting her earrings, brushing her hair aside when there’s a gust of wind, or placing your hand on her back while crossing the street. A touch is very personal, so you really need to be careful and see how she reacts to your touches before you touch her again. [Read: How to flirt by touching]

If you want to know how to charm a girl and impress her, use these five steps the next time you meet a girl you like. And you’ll see how great an impression you can make in the very first conversation!

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  • Graham

    This article does have a lot of good points, but I think there’s one thing that really matters if a guy has to charm a girl. Great looks!

    I know for a fact that American girls like to only be charmed by good looking guy. In the article, it’s written that if a guy charms a girl well, she’d want to kiss him. But I don’t think a good looking girl would want to kiss an ugly guy.

    So how can a guy charm a girl? Girls are shallow, and care only about looks. I’ve been there and no matter how good you are or how funny and smart you are, girls don’t care unless you have the money for their bling, and good looks.

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  • charley

    I disagee with prior posters comments. Although a man having good looks helps, it’s NOT a requirement for geting a babe.

    If you have enough other attrubutes, good looks aren’t necessary.

    Some of the ugliest men on the planet have some of the hottest women.

    Examples: Most rockstars are ugly. Some are extremely ugly. Yet they date very hot women (often several at a time).

    Billy Bob Thornton is so ugly he makes my eyes bleed, yet he had Anjolena Joley craving his touch, and I’m sure he’s had plenty of other hotties.

    I personally witnesed saw a little man (midget) get one of the most beautiful women I’ve ever seen. The little guy was not rich or famous. He is charming and brave. He charms her, and when her X (full size bully) gave her problems, the lil guy kicked his butt. Then lil guy comforted her.

    I’m not much to look at, but I know two very beautiful women who love talking with me. One also loves when I touch her. I know I’m not imagining it because if I rub her back a little, soon she’s sitting so close she’s pressed up against me. Soon after that she rubs her body on mine like a friendly cat. Why do these girls like me? It’s not my looks. I do make a point of having good hygiene and being clean and smelling good. Beyond that, I make them feel good. I make them happy, whisper compliments occasionally, and generally I make them feel safe and happy.

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  • FelineGrace

    These are great tips, and I would know cause I’m a woman ^_^

    A tip I’d like to give men is that you CANNOT underestimate the power of SMELL. For many women, and men as well, someone’s smell has A LOT to do with getting a date or partner. If your clothes smell like your dog sleeps with you, your breath smells like you haven’t brushed in weeks, and/or your hair smells like your dirty socks… won’t get far no matter HOW charming you are!!!
    Those commercials on t.v. about smell and perfume and deoderant really are right on the spot if you think about it. Women won’t mind getting close to you or letting you hold and hug her if you smell clean and healthy. If a man has average looks but smells GREAT….I’m all over him ^_^ But if there’s a sexy looking man that smells like he doesn’t wipe very well…the whole time I’m with him I want to tell him to get into the shower but can’t because it’s not polite XP

    Also, don’t over do it with the axe and body spray either!!! It makes our eyes sting and throats burn. <3 Peace!

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  • ethan

    well i like this girl but i dont know what to do her older sister likes me a bit and i look average and smell clean. people say we are perfect for each other but i get nervous when thinking of making any move on her. also her friends like me as a friend plz help :]

  • david

    that is true what peolpe have to say that girls go for the pretty girls if it was an unattractive boy trying to charm a girl the girl will get disgusted and avoid them it is like a waste of time girls are too judgeble no offense but its true girls wouldnt mind if a pretty boy likes them at all and tell her how they feel about them trust me i been there for example there is no girl that likes me thats because im unattractive there was this girl that i like that i know for so long and guess what she likes someone else lucky person that she likes and dosent even know it and there was this girl that like but then as it was middle school and she was shocked that like and told me that i wasnt attractive at all and then six years and last month i saw her with her boyfriend when i was at the bus and i saw them kissing and he was good looking for her to like for me it was just terrible which i learned from now love dosent really exist at all only for the attractive men or boys and for the ugly ones like me are pretty much screwed its like a burden

  • Michael

    Here is the interesting thing about touch differences between men and women; women show/arouse interest by the small touches; touching your forearm or upper arm when talking, sometimes the knee etc. One thing that always works to at least demonstrate interest it to invade personal space. I don’t mean leaning in too close. I mean alpha male taking up space. If you’re at the bar your leaning with your arm in her arm space etc. It sounds creepy and does NOT work if you haven’t established some prior connection through talking but it immediately establishes your interest and ‘dominance’. Call me crazy if you want but try it and watch guys who are successful with women at bars. They are NOT leaning away.

  • Jayce

    Teasing a girl is also a good thing. I mean not when your introducing yourself but after you have gotten to know her. I know it works from experience.

  • Pelham

    I don’t know… Reading this stuff is easy. The implementation is a lot more challenging.

  • Bobsuruncle

    @Charley …. rockstars such as Billy Bob Thorton might be ugly as an elephant’s arsehole but they’re sticking rich so hot and attractive women are litteraly crawling over them 24/7 .

    I found this article great, gave me some good ideas for when I pop to Paris to see this amazing girl I’ve tried hooking up with for 2 years … wish me luck ;)

  • Anonymous

    As a woman I will tell you what kind of man women really want:
    – kind
    – handsome
    – honest
    – faithful/loyal
    – funny (at least to her)
    – intelligent
    – caring
    – thoughtful
    – stable
    – easy to talk to
    – genuine

    These are the characteristics and things that women do NOT like:
    – arrogant
    – rude
    – shallow
    – cheater
    – liar
    – disrespectful
    – violent
    – selfish
    – too lazy
    – sleeps around a lot or things he can get any girl
    – big egos are a vig turn off… Bragging isn’t cool
    – dirty old men who try to hit on much younger women – trust me these younger women feel grossed out, creeped out, and embarrassed when you do that. They’ll either find you disgusting or scary, or they will just laugh behind your back. If they date you just for money then don’t ecpect them to really respect/love you and don’t expect them to be loyal in many cases.

    Basically, just be a nice genuine guy! You don’t need cheesy pick up lines and you don’t need to show off. Those “how to pick up attractive women” websites and books are not gonna work & land you a supermodel unless you’re a young Brad Pitt. Girls just want a guy who has a good personality and is attractive to them personally.

  • Tiko

    Im in love with this girl for about two yrs now she was into me but about a year ago
    She started dating another guy.. Im in my final yr of high school n will prob never see
    her again.. Were really close like super tight but she thinks of me as one of her best
    friends. We flirt occasionally but at a friend level and not so much recently but i cant
    stop thinking bout her n i kno shes the one because since her (dated in middle school n she moved then came back for the last two yrs) ive never been able to like another girl after we hook up its like my brain switches n all i think about is her…
    i dont kno wat is left to do ive only got about a month left but some better advice would
    soo much appreciated… Pls help.. :/

  • Don classic

    @tiko, she takes you as one of her best friends, to me, that makes it 99percent easier for me to let my mind known to her asap

  • mike

    Great advice. I need to pass this on to my friend Bill. He doesnt know how to treat a girl. He blows farts in the girl’s faces when he dates them, thinking he has a sence of humor. This really turns the girls off and he needs to realize that.

  • chinx

    These are really awesome tips, they have really changed me into a charmer. Keep it coming guys, you can really change the world.

  • harydasiva

    Hi all, I really need your support on this issue.
    I am married, but I never had sex with my wife for the last 10 years. I am getting bored. I joked her saying I would look for a rubber toy to enjoy as you don’t give me.
    She is suspecting that I may have a girl friend.
    Recently, I visited a massage parlour where I met this wonderful , beautiful girl I have been looking for. We were together two times, the first time I met her I liked her very much and gave her a brand new cell phone as a gift.
    She was happy and thanked me. Later, on the same day we talked about us , and I told her all most all about me and showed her that I am a genuine guy looking for a very kind caring girl. Sha said about her parents and that she studies law at Uni. third year.
    I asked her whether we could meet in the different place to build up trust between us.
    She was very happy about this suggestion.

    Shall I proceed with this girl as I see She as a Genuine girl?

  • Godwino

    @harydasiva you had better stick to your God given blessed wife….I have so many reasons but I would like to give you one of them.
    1..My dad is already a victim of what you are planning to do and it has affected his life so badly that he had to start life afreash.You better be afraid of God…A word is enough for a wise.

  • Dan

    I had to say something for that guy that hasn’t slept with his wife in 10 years.

    Firstly, if your a older guy, just stick with your wife, your near death anyway.

    If your a 30’s-40s age guy…10 years?!??!?! I’m sorry, I would’ve left a long time ago. If the problem wasn’t resolved in 1 year, I would’ve left. Unless of course something bad happened to her and it makes it hard for her. Then sticking with her through the hard times is what your there for. But if shes just not giving it up, or no passion. Whats the point of being married? Sex is part of passion. No passion? No point being married.

    Other than that, great article.

  • Leon

    This works like a charm.

  • Jeremy

    no one has to flatter a girl with just comments about her style or looks, i met a girl at a rock climbing gym, and commented on how strong her hands were while touching her fingers. She got all giddy with excitement!! all this stuff does work. And yes i am overweight.

  • Leo

    I have a friend who is practically a goddess. I mean, in the street, sometimes people stop and stare. She considers me one of her best friends, but I have loved her for a long time. I am a little timid, so touching is off the table, but I really want her to become interested in me beyond friendship. We are exactly alike (except for looks), and she is so fantastic that I can’t afford to lose any ground in our relationship. I just don’t know how I would get out of the friend zone. She likes strong guys, so I went from benching 45 to 150. I always try to look good in front of her, and we always have a great time together. I just want to know how to get her.

  • Jose Cespedes

    She is receptive and responsive…today I came back to the bagel cafe quite a few miles from my
    house, but it never crossed my mind that she’d show up, I was sitting when she saw me, she asked why I haven’t come back! (smiling), I guess I made quite an impression because I did not expect such a reaction. I would like to know how to proceed, is evidently is a weird friendship, she’s behind the counter, besides I said I see you later, so it occurred to me to save it for later, wait for her since she responded well…I should have said something right then, but it was crowded (no excuses). How do I manage to make this weird friendship so I can ask her to go somewhere as friends. I can say now that we’re talking that means we are friends. Any advice. Forwarded to my email, please!

  • David

    Ok so I’ve been trying to find help for my situation and unfortunately the closest I’ve come is a thread on some creep infested bodybuilding site where the best advice was considered to be “f*** them all” and that’s not the advice I’m looking for. So here’s my story. I met the woman who I still believe is my soulmate about 2 years ago and she unfortunately lives in another country. I moved there after a time, but ultimately I had to return back to the states in order to do what was best for both of our children and leave her behind. After months of moping around I finally started to regain my old self back (outgoing, friendly, charming, energetic, etc. – qualities stated by numerous females, both partners and friends). Now I have always had many girls who were friends while having a single solid girlfriend that I remained loyal too. However after my heartbreak I decided I did not want to be in a relationship and would therefore refrain from getting involved romantically with anyone, since I am a “sucker for love” and always have been. Of course this means that I quickly met a girl that I was dating for a couple of months until I had to start working again, which cooled things down some. During this time I also got back into a music scene that I have had a passion for since I was a teen and through this scene I was quickly introduced and hit it off with 2 other women from my approximate area, within an hour drive, and a 3rd that lives very far away. The problem is this. I started all of these relationships around the same time and all began as friendships. However because I genuinely care about them and their problems and will go out of my way to help them deal with their issues, as well as being funny in a harmless, joking way, and taking an active interest in what each woman is into, all 3 have now fallen for me, and in some respects I have fallen for each of them. I think all 3 are amazing people and I would love to find out If any of them could be the person I end up with permanently, however I hate the thought of hurting someone and each has made it very clear to me that they are head over heels for me and since I do not want to play the “let them initiate all contact, don’t get attachment feelings, etc” I feel stuck!! As I said I truly care about and like all of the woman I am currently talking to and although things have only progressed physically with one of them, that seems to be more because she is the one that I am able to see the most since are schedules happen to align relatively often. Now I do not want to come across or be considered a male chauvinistic pig, or a guy who uses women for his own pleasure. That is not the case at all, an in fact, in all 4 cases (the initial girl I dated for a couple months has stated she is totally in love with me as well) the attraction for them came about because I listened to them and have them sound advice for handling their life issues that ultimately worked, that I did not ever act like a creepy guy who talked to then because all I was interested in was sex and because in the words of all 4 “I’m the sweetest guy they’ve ever met” and make them laugh on top of it. So my question is what so I do so that even if I ultimately must choose 1 (which I know will be the case as I figure out who I’m most compatible with) I can remain friends with the others? Not for a backup but because they are awesome people who I would love to be friends with for as long as possible, and even forever if it’s feasible?! As I said I an physical with only 1 girl as of now (the 1 from earlier I have stopped sleeping with) and the other 2 I’m not having sex with is probably do to mostly distance and lack of time together since in all cases the physical attract huh and chemistry is there. Can ANYONE please help me so that I don’t hurt any of these amazing women? Or at least no more than I may have made it inevitable already? Any HONEST help would be appreciated and thank you in advance, as this is the ONLY site where I was able to find comments that were not filled with answers like “all 4 dtf hahaha” or “is this even a question? Screw them all and be in your way”. That is NOT the answer for me and I hope SOMEONE can help!! Thank you so much!!

  • Trevor

    What should I do if the girl doesn’t even know I exist

  • Vidia

    Guys i’m a girl and I know what girls want so here goes.

    1. Make up a sort of game not a stupid one like a board game but like whenever you see each other do something. I know a guy and whenever we see each other we click at each other and laugh, it sounds silly but it works!

    2.Find out what they d at break/lunch and go to that place, like if they go to the library go to the library and hang out near them.

    3.Don’t tell them that you like them but give signs that yo do like look at them and when they see you quickly turn but make sure they see you do it!

    4.Point out their hair and say it looks nice, but don’t say it if it looks actually really horrible!.

    Hope I helped!

    Oh yeah and Trover-Go introduce yourself

  • Cerulean

    Trevor: you might want to observe her for a while, figure out some things she likes, and maybe get to know her friends. then just go up and talk to her. you could ask her about something she’s doing, or talk to her about something she likes, but make sure it’s something you are actually interested in. most girls will remember a guy if they can have a genuine conversation with them. it may take a few times before she remembers your name well, but if you can talk to her, she’ll know you’re there.

    just for guys in general: please don’t get a friend of yours to ask a girl if she’s into you. it comes off as insecure, and a bit weird. I’ve had guys do that to me, and one friend-of-the-guy-who-was-interested-in-me asked for my number to give to the guy without even telling me his shy friend’s name. I for one will not give my number to a guy without knowing their name or even what they look like. on the other hand, having the girl’s friend ask if she’s interested is a good tactic. a girl will usually tell her friends such information without hesitation, although you should make sure it is set up to sound like the girl’s friend wants to know, not you. getting to know the friends of a girl you like will help you a lot, because girls will talk about guys with their friends, and a girl will often look to her friends to know if a guy is nice to everyone, or if he’s acting nice only for her. asking the girl out, however, is something you should do yourself, as it shows both confidence and communication skills.

  • shola kendrick

    These articles are just the best please how can I get them on my email please help out need to go over this again and again

  • Antony Andrew

    Thank you for this info. I hope it helps me in the category of love.

  • Unkown

    Cant girls love a guy for who he is..?! Doing whts written ova there is a must to get tht girl ..? So pain ….! Im to lazy nd plus girls hate lazy guyz whts wrong girls..?! Girls y u no understand :< …!

  • Sentalo Godfrey

    its the best , how can j get them in my life and blood?.