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How to Be More Masculine: Start Listening to Your Instincts

how to be more masculine

Society seeks to emasculate men. If you want to know how to be more masculine, stop listening to what people tell you and listen to your instincts.

Guys, I don’t envy you. Although, I don’t always like what society tells me a woman is supposed to do, in the end, it is typically what my brain tells me anyway. When it comes to boys, there has been a campaign since the seventies to squash everything male and make it bad. If you wonder how to be more masculine, I don’t blame you for the question.

How to be more masculine by following your instincts

Our society attempted to take everything masculine and make it bad. Competition, bad, aggressive, bad, rambunctious, bad. The problem is when we take out all those qualities, what we do is strip guys of being guys and leave only shells in their wake. I can’t imagine if someone told me every instinct and impulse I had was wrong. Instead, I should aspire to be something I am not, female.

So, if you tire of someone telling you that you can’t be what you were meant to be, stop listening to the rhetoric. Men, it is time for you to stand up for yourself, buck the system, make some noise, be loud, be aggressive. Dammit, be what you were meant to be—hunters and protectors!

#1 Be competitive. No, that does not mean you cheat, lie, and steal your way to the top, which is how almost all movies and Hollywood paints successful people. It does mean your goal is not to play nice or foster someone else’s self-esteem.

You win fairly and foster your own self-esteem. Seek to get ahead, work to knock people in your way, desire to win it all, and stand at the top the mountain screaming “I am king.” Competition is what makes us all better. It isn’t what makes us all unequal. [Read: 13 opposing traits of weak and strong men]

#2 Be aggressive. Yes, you are supposed to be the protectors and the hunters. Stop buying into the theory that you are supposed to “play nice” all the time. Be fair, but don’t bend over backwards just to play nice and fit in with everyone else. Take chances, dream big, and go for great without worrying about what others would think of you, for not fitting in with the herd. [Read: The fear of failure and why you shouldn’t be afraid to fail]

#3 Stop sitting still. No, you don’t have to sit quietly in your chair behaving, not interrupting, and never causing conflict. Men should challenge one another, be boisterous, and cause trouble to create change.

Sitting still isn’t what you were meant for. You are the gender of taking things into your own hands, standing up when it is time to stand up, and being the movers and shakers. Stop sitting still and waiting for things to come to you. Be active, take control, and go after what you want.

#4 Be the leader. I am sorry to say it, but guys don’t get the promotions more often because it is an old man’s club. They get the promotions because guys are instinctual leaders. Sure, not all of them, and that doesn’t mean that women can’t be leaders too.

But, the fact that men are better at separating their emotions to see a situation for what it is, is a scientific fact. That doesn’t make you better or worse, it makes you different. It is that difference that our society relies on to make the hard decisions not based on emotion.

Decisions made emotionally in business or for protection are rarely the right ones for anyone. [Read: Defining true masculinity – What does it really mean to be a man?]

#5 Be strong. I am tired of girls saying they want to go to war or that they want to be a fireman. Not that I care if they are, I think if a girl is strong enough she should get her shot.

But, if a fire breaks out at my home and I need someone to move my butt down a ladder three stories up, I want someone strong enough to move it, be it a man or a woman. That also means you are mentally strong.

You can’t break down at the first sign of trouble or lose your shit over the smallest thing. It is okay for a guy to cry when something super bad happens. It is not okay for them to cry over the slightest thing. If you want to know how to be more masculine, don’t cry as much as I do. It is your evolutionary job to be the strong one, body and mind.

#6 Be yourself. It isn’t that women don’t want you to work out and look good for us, but if you take longer to get ready, it is way too much of your time being thrown in the wrong direction.

If you wax your eyebrows, get a mani-pedi more often than the average woman, it needs to stop. Guys are supposed to be rough around the edges. Yes, that means uneven cuticles, a little hair where it is inconvenient, and that you are out of the shower in ten minutes, not two hours *that isn’t masculine at all*. [Read: 20 toxic masculine traits that aren’t toxic at all]

#7 Know how to fix things. I fix a great dinner. I fix a boo-boo when my children fall. I even sometimes Google my computer to fix something. But, if you want to be more masculine, then don’t be a caller, be a fixer.

When something breaks, don’t pick up the phone to call someone, unless you have to. Figure it out yourself. The most masculine guys I know have the right tool, knowledge, and drive to say, “Screw it, I will do it myself.”

#8 Be respectful. Part of being masculine is to acknowledge women respectfully. Yes, we are equal. No, we are not the same. If you want to be more masculine, show respect to the other gender.

That means opening up the door for a woman, pulling out her chair, opening her car door, or even pulling over to help her change a flat tire. Masculinity is about protecting the less strong in society and respecting the other half of it that bears the children to keep the human race alive. [Read: How to be attractive to women and a cut above all other guys]

#9 Be brave. When things go bump in the night, be the one who investigates and tells your girlfriend or wife to stay put. If there is a spider, a mouse, or any other pest threatening your homestead, be the one to squash it.

If there is danger present, put yourself in front of the knife. The most masculine trait a guy exhibits is bravery and fearlessness. If you can be those two things, they are the epitome of masculinity. [Read: How to be a man the way he really should be]

#10 Have convictions. There is nothing more masculine than holding to ideals and strong convictions and sticking to them. Being willing to die for what you believe in is something that not many of us, man or woman, are willing to do. But, it is a very masculine trait to feel strongly enough about something that you will go to your death fighting for what is right.

The biggest question in the minds of many women is “Where have all the real men gone?” The truth is they are still here, they have just been programmed to think being masculine is wrong, ugly, and bad. You don’t really have to ask how to be more masculine, just stop letting society tell you what and who you should be, instead follow your instinct.

No matter how hard our society attempts to stamp out every male trait, the true men rise above it and find their way. Going against the grain to uncover their true nature and relish in it.

[Read: What is masculinity? The truth behind what women want in men]

Knowing how to be more masculine means being yourself, and going with what you know in your heart, not what you were told growing up. Your compass and instincts are true, the propaganda is not.

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Julie Keating
Julie Keating

A writer isn’t born, but created out of experiences. No lack of subject matter, my life reads more like fiction than anything that could have been imagined...

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