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20 Ways to Build Sexual Tension with a Girl & Make Her Thirst for You

Building sexual tension is half the fun of an encounter! First, learn how to build sexual tension with a girl, until you’re both at bursting point.

how to build sexual tension with a girl over text

Sexual tension is a sexy thing, and learning to build sexual tension with a girl slowly to the point of no control, well, that’s just the wildest feeling ever! It can make you feel good about yourself, can make life so much more exciting, and can give you something to look forward to everyday.

Have you ever experienced sexual tension with a colleague at work? Then you’d know just how exciting it feels to drive to work every morning.

No Monday blues, no sick leaves, nothing. You’re just excited to see this person and enjoy the sexual tension lurking in the shadows. But of course, first you need to learn how to build sexual tension with a girl and get to that point!

The good news is that it’s not actually that hard. You simply need to know what sexual tension is and then take on board a few tips. You can also learn how to build sexual tension with a girl over text, if you’re not so confident at first. [Read: How to flirt with girls – 25 secrets to help you win any girl over and slowly seduce her]

What is sexual tension?

Sexual tension is that fuzzy, sexual feeling that two people who are interested in each other feel when they’re in close proximity to each other.

Have you enjoyed a little flirty game with someone at work without really talking about it? That’s sexual tension. You may not like this person romantically, but you still enjoy the racy tension that’s building up between the both of you. You feel hot, bothered, and totally tingly whenever this person is around.

But, sexual tension is also silent. You don’t talk about it and you don’t admit that you like each other that way. After all, if you do ask your flirty sexual tension friend out, you’re killing the sexual tension because you’ve now made it obvious that both of you share something lustful in your minds.

So if you want to just enjoy the sexual tension, don’t ever say it out. Well, unless you want to take it to the next level of sexual intimacy or romance. [Read: What causes sexual tension? What exactly does it feel like?]

How to build sexual tension with a girl and seduce her slowly

Do you share something flirty with a friend of the opposite sex?

Firstly, if you want to build sexual tension with a sexy friend, you need to know her already. If you don’t, find a way to get to know her better.

If you try building sexual tension with a girl who doesn’t really like you, you may just end up creeping her out or making her hate even standing next to you. So play it safe, build the sexual tension and enjoy the playful secret flirting.

If you want to build a sexual connection without ever telling your friend that you’re interested in her, learn to build the sexual tension using these bold, yet subtle ways. [Read: How to get a girl to notice you without talking to her]

1. Sneaky eye contact

Make eye contact often. But don’t be obvious about it. Look at this friend you like, but just as she looks back at you, look away. When you’re trying to build sexual tension, it’s all about being discreet.

Even if you get caught looking, just smile at this girl and look away in a second. When you make someone wonder if you were actually looking at them, you’re making them think of you and wonder if you’ve got more than friends on your mind. [Read: 13 subtle eye contact flirting moves to catch a girl’s eye from afar and leave her thinking of you]

2. Talk a little naughty

Talk naughty, but don’t get dirty. Whenever the opportunity arises, talk about something funny and yet flirty.

If you can see a bit of her cleavage, look straight at it and look away while smiling in an obvious manner. She may immediately notice you looking away, but she’d know you noticed it. You can talk naughty or just use your gestures, as long as you make it clear you’re flirting with her. [Read: 14 naughty ways to get out of the friend zone in no time]

3. Compliment with a hint of sex

Does she look particularly good today? Compliment her and talk about how stunning she looks in the particular shirt or dress.

If you want to build sexual tension with a girl, you need to let her know that you admire her sexually without ever telling her directly that you find her sexy. [Read: How to compliment a girl and make her blush]

4. Get into her personal space

When two people like each other, there’s always sexual tension in the air. Stand really close to her, almost to the point of touching her when you get the opportunity.

Standing in a crowded elevator? Talking together with a group of friends? Get really close to her.

If she doesn’t take a step back or better yet, if she moves in closer, that’s definitely a very good sign she’s totally into you and feeling the sexual tension as well.

5. Lingering touches

Are you trying to point something out on her phone? Let your arm graze against hers for a few seconds while you’re at it. Are you crossing the street with her? Place your hand on her back.

Always look for opportunities to exchange lingering touches with her. It’s the easiest way to make her feel the tingle of sexual tension without ever making it obvious. And she’ll definitely enjoy it too. [Read: How to get a girl horny and wet just by sitting next to her]

6. Show yourself off

Look for ways to show off your sexy assets, be it your charm or your physique. Now this will work only if she’s already sexually attracted to you, so make sure you’ve warmed her up first with the earlier moves.

Let her take a sneak peek of you in your bare minimum *but no, definitely no dick pics!* or perhaps, give her the opportunity to graze your package accidentally. Do anything that’ll make things more sexually exciting and awkward at the same time.

If there is indeed sexual tension between both of you, anything that increases sexual awkwardness will definitely increase the sexual tension as well.

7. Prolonged goodbyes

Whenever you’re about to say goodbye, make her feel like you don’t want to say goodbye at all. Don’t do this when there are others around though. Sexual tension should always be a well-kept secret.

Every time you have to say goodbye to her, hug her but linger just a second more than normal. Delay the goodbye with some idle talk or just stare deeply into her eyes like you want to say something, but are holding the thought back. It’ll take the sexual tension to an all-new high. [Read: Romantic vs friendly hug and how to feel the difference instantly]

8. Overdo the gestures

Hold her hands when you have the opportunity, but almost clasp them by slightly interlacing your fingers with hers. Kiss her on her cheeks while saying goodbye, but almost kiss her lips. Place your hand on the back while crossing the street, but get it almost near her butt. Whisper in her ears when you have to say something quietly, but let your lips graze her ears.

You get what we mean, don’t you? Use regular gestures and turn them into super sexy sexual tension builders. [Read: How to flirt by touch and use subtle body language to seduce a girl]

9. Back away when it’s coming out in the open

Sexual tension gets stronger when it’s kept a secret, even between you and your friend. Both of you may know it and feel the sexual tension, but it’s all good as long as it’s kept a secret.

If you feel like there’s an opportunity to talk about it, back away from it.

Well, unless you do want to get the sexual tension out in public and do something about it. The longer you keep the sexual tension a secret, the more you can build the sexual tension. [Read: How to get a girl to have sex with you by arousing her very subtly]

10. Act on it, but don’t overdo it

How far are you willing to take it? Now that you’ve built the sexual tension up, it has to go somewhere. Do you like this girl, or are you just terribly sexually attracted to her?

If you’re going to constantly rouse the sexual tension between you and a friend, the bubble has to burst at some point. So what are you going to do, make out or get out? [Read: Mutual sexual tension – 44 signs, causes and secrets to make her way more horny]

How to build sexual tension with a girl over text

Not everyone is comfortable with flirting up a storm with a girl in front of them.

For sure, if you want this to go anywhere, you’re going to have to actually speak directly to them at some point but for now, you can learn how to build sexual tension with a girl over text.

1. Build a connection 

First, you need to build that connection that holds you together. That’s the foundation of sexual tension. Do you have things in common?

Maybe you both like the same things? That way, you’ll have something to talk about and you can start adding in a little of the naughty side from there. [Read: Do couples always have to like the same things?]

2. Start slowly 

Don’t jump straight in and make them understand very clearly that you have the hots for them. Instead, you need to talk about normal things and then heat things up slowly.

Over time, turn up the heat even more. You’ll get a sense of when is good to talk to them, when they’re busy, and when they’re at their chattiest. So, your first couple of texts should just be quite light and normal. [Read: How to flirt with a girl over text – 26 tips and examples to leave her hooked]

3. Ask questions 

If you want to learn how to build sexual tension with a girl over text, don’t talk them half to death! Ask questions and that way you’re encouraging them to partake in the conversation too.

When you start to be a little naughty with your words, they will respond in kind and that’s how you get the tension burning! [Read: 6 subtle flirty questions you MUST ask your crush]

4. Keep an eye on their responses

Because you’re not in front of them, you can’t read their body language or their facial expression. So instead, you need to read between the lines a little.

If she’s responding with one-word answers, then you’re probably not making the right impression. In that case, hold off a little and try again. If she leaves you on read and doesn’t respond, you can basically say that building sexual tension is a no-go. 

You’ll also learn your limits here too. If you say something and she goes a little quiet, for sure, she may be busy but if it happens more than once, you’ve probably crossed a line.

In that case, back off and go back to being friendly. You have to keep an eye on her responses and react accordingly. [Read: How to read people – The 12 secrets to figure anyone out instantly]

5. Tease a little 

When you’re sure that you’re on the right track, you can send some teasing texts. You can also send texts whenever it feels right to do so and you don’t have to try and hold a long conversation. In that case, building sexual tension with a girl over text is actually easier! 

6. Be a little naughty

Just as we mentioned in our general section on building sexual tension with a girl, you can be naughty via text, but don’t go all out sexting. That’s something you’ll reserve for when things are actually physical between you, if it gets to that point.

You can make a flirty compliment, or say something like “I wish you were here with me now” and see what her response is. [Read: 40 naughty, playful texts to keep things hot and horny]

7. Do not send dick pics

Seriously, don’t. You’re not building sexual tension by doing that, you’re turning her right off. Unless she specifically asked you to do so, sending a picture of your privates is crossing every kind of line there is.

Plus, the sexual tension is basically blown out of the window by that point anyway, don’t you think?

8. Send texts spontaneously 

Sexual tension is a surprise thing. It should never arrive like clockwork. So, don’t get into a routine of sending her texts at a specific time every day. That way, it becomes routine and sexual tension is never that.

Instead, wait until she’s at work and send her a quick flirty text. Leave it at that and see how she responds.

If she’s busy, she may not respond straight away and that’s fine. But, you’ll have made the right impact and she’ll no doubt be smiling all day. [Read: The best (200+) flirty texts and sweet messages to make any girl smile]

9. Hold off occasionally 

We just mentioned not making things routine. In that case, sometimes you need to hold back. The great thing about learning how to build sexual tension with a girl over text is that you can fire off a quick text and go about your day, or you can not send one and wait and see what happens.

You can also just send a quick winking emoji and no words. Mix it up and see how she responds. [Read: 43 things to talk about with your crush and make them think of you]

10. Make sure that you read your texts before you send them

This might sound a little teacher-ish, but seriously, bad grammar and spelling are major turn-offs. Make sure you do a quick proofread before you send a text.

There’s nothing worse than reading a text full of mistakes or slang. Also, just one wrong letter can totally change the meaning of a word and she might not even get that you’re trying to be a little naughty with her!

Whether you’re learning how to build sexual tension with a girl over text or in person, make sure you follow these tips and you’ll be high on flirty fun before you know it. Remember, keep it naughty but avoid being all-out sexy.

[Read: How to tease a girl over text and 15 ways to get her to flirt back]

You can either let the sexual tension simmer on a low flame and let it die down eventually. Or you can use these tips on building sexual tension with a girl and make out with her and have the wildest time ever.

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Vinod Srinivas Serai
Vin Serai
Vin Serai is the founder of LovePanky.com, and has delved deep into the working of love and relationships for almost two decades. Having dipped his feet in almo...