The age of texting is taking over the dating world, and it only makes sense that you master the art and learn how to flirt with a girl over text.
Flirting in general is a very natural thing that happens when you meet someone that you have chemistry with and that you find physically attractive. While it normally happens when meeting in person *because that’s where you have those physical feelings*, it’s actually more common over texting nowadays.
Most people meet someone at the bar and would rather exchange numbers instead of taking the night away from their friends in order to get to know a girl better. While this is a great way to pick up girls, it’s hard to actually date them.
Your guide on how to flirt with a girl over text
Flirting over a text can be more fun because you’re more confident when you’re not actually face-to-face. There are times where I say things over text that I couldn’t imagine saying to someone I didn’t know very well. But that’s the fun of it! [Read: How to text a girl and get her to fall for you]
However, texting can also make it difficult to flirt because there’s the absence of facial expressions and body language – something that is the biggest part of flirting in person. So with those important factors out of the equation, you have a lot more to make up for.
Just as there are certain things you have to do differently in order to successfully flirt with a girl over text, there are also some things you should avoid. Here’s your guide on how to flirt with a girl over text.
#1 Don’t be too serious. When you’re texting, it’s really hard to understand what’s a joke and what’s serious because of the lack of tone of voice and facial expressions. This means that you have to keep things light and simple – otherwise a girl might confuse them for being serious and that’s not very flirtatious. [Read: 50 fun and flirty text messages that are sure to make her smile]
#2 Don’t make references she might not understand. It might seem like a good idea to flirt and make cute references, but if she doesn’t know where they’re coming from, it won’t come across as flirting. So if you want to make a reference, first ask if she’s seen the movie, video, or heard the song, and then transition into it. You’ll avoid a lot of awkward confusion this way.
#3 Emojis are a girl’s favorite way of flirting. If you can use emojis, then start studying up on how to use them well because girls LOVE using emojis to flirt. Not only will you have to shoot her some wink faces if you’re making a funny joke, but you’ll have to get creative with them and you’ll see how much better she responds. Emojis also help take the guesswork out of the context of your message. [Read: 20 flirty ways to text your crush and get her interested in you]
#4 Be subtle. A really good way to flirt with a girl over text is to be really subtle about how you do it. This gives her an opportunity to come back at you with a flirty text or ignore the whole thing completely. Not only will it keep you looking cool and nonchalant, but she’ll also sit there after the conversation wondering about what you meant – always a good thing.
#5 Your opening has to be clever. If you just send a “hi ;)” and think that you’re being flirty, think again. You should always open your conversation with a flirty comment that’s more than just an informal greeting. Starting off the conversation on a flirty note sets the mood for the whole conversation. It’s a much better way to flirt with a girl over text. [Read: How to make a girl want you and think of you sexually]
#6 Don’t even try sending a “mis-text.” You know, the text message that you “accidentally” sent to her but you meant to send to someone else even though you just purposely sent it to her in order to start up a conversation. Yeah, don’t do that.
#7 Don’t take forever to text her back. This is actually super annoying to girls and doesn’t make them want you more. In fact, it’ll probably make her have less interest in you because you’re showing less interest in her. So if you’re by your phone and get a text, respond. If you’re busy and she texts, don’t respond. Just don’t try to “play hard to get” because it won’t work.
#8 Don’t send multiple unanswered texts. Another very common mistake men make when trying to flirt with a girl is sending multiple unanswered texts. You shouldn’t be sending text after text if she’s not replying – especially if you’re trying to explain a flirty message. Instead, just wait for her to reply because she could just be busy and not ignoring you. [Read: What a guy needs to do when a girl plays hard to get with him]
#9 Never try to text when you’re drunk. What’s clever to your drunk self is not going to be funny and clever to her sober. If you want to flirt with a girl over text when you’re drunk – just don’t. It is just a huge no-no. Plus, you could say something offensive and she will be even more turned off.
#10 Compliment her. Don’t think that just because you’re not in person that you can’t compliment her. The thing about flirting over text is that you should be complimenting her about everything besides her physical appearance – because you can’t see her. Compliment her choice of hobbies or music instead and send over a cute emoji along with it. [Read: 19 sweet compliments for girls that’ll make them go “awww…”]
#11 Make some cute and even corny jokes. When you flirt with a girl over text, don’t be afraid to hit her with a silly pickup line. Just because you’re not in person doesn’t mean you can’t be cute or funny. As long as the pickup lines aren’t offensive in any way, you should be good to go. Making her laugh while you’re not even there will get her in a really flirty mood.
#12 Text her in the morning. Any texts later than 9pm usually indicate that you’re only interested in her for one thing – and that’s not something that she’ll be happy about. Texting her in the morning shows that you’re thinking about her right away, and she’ll be more open to your flirtatious advances. [Read: How to win a girl’s heart and impress her effortlessly]
#13 NEVER ask for naughty pictures. A lot of guys make the mistake of thinking their asking for naughty pictures translates to them flirting when in all actuality, it only means that you’re a perv that wants dirty pictures. Never expect or ask for these pictures no matter what mood you’re in. This is NOT a good way to flirt with a girl over text.
#14 Make her feel important. Flirting over a text is more than just sending a wink face. Since you’re not in person and can’t convey just how you feel through your body language, you have to show her that via text. Making her feel important and special is definitely a way of flirting that comes across through text. [Read: 36 random, racy and funny questions for flirty guys and girls]
#15 Be yourself. Don’t try to be someone else. It may be easy to change your persona to be cooler and it’s much easier to lie about your hobbies over text, but neither of those will come off as sincere. Not to mention what would happen if you actually get to go on a date with her. Just be yourself and you’ll see that flirting – even over a text – will come naturally to you.
Winning a girl over via texting isn’t something that I would consider easy. However, if you really want to make her yours, follow this guide on how to flirt with a girl over text, and melt her heart one text at a time!
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Bella is a lifestyle writer, cheese enthusiast (Wisconsin native over here) and fantasy adventure author-in-progress who enjoys all things love, dog, p...