How to Date a High-Maintenance Girl without Going Broke

date a high maintenance girl

She may look like a million bucks, but before you max out credit cards and take out loans, here are 10 tips on dating a high-maintenance woman.

Who says high-maintenance women are superficial? Sure, they’re like sports cars—they’re fun, they look good, and they’re nice to show off while out on the town. Despite their good looks and high-quality standards, they also need a lot of work. Still, high-maintenance women aren’t all about fancy cars, designer clothes, jewelry, makeup, and everything high-end.

Before we start thinking about stereotypes and take out the “gold digger” card, think of high-maintenance women as women who merely have high standards, have lived those high standards, and expect those standards to be maintained.

There really is nothing wrong with women who spend a little more time to look good, are motivated by their own standards, who know what they want, and are driven to succeed. They may be challenging, but with the right approach, you can snag yourself a high-maintenance woman for keeps and have her take care of you just as well as she takes care of herself.

How to date a high-maintenance woman

If you want to date a high-maintenance woman without breaking the bank and being broke, pull off these budget-friendly tricks:

#1 Fine dining at home. You know she likes good food, but it doesn’t have to be pricey. Instead of taking her out to a fine-dining restaurant, why not make that Michelin-starred five-course dinner right in your own home?

Look up recipes on the internet, learn how to plate your food, and start grocery shopping *or make do with what’s already in your pantry*. Dress up in your finest suit, turn on her favorite love songs, light some candles to set the mood, and be her very own personal chef. [Read: 13 very romantic dinner date ideas]

#2 Blockbuster movie night. You may not be able to give her the red carpet treatment to attend a star-studded premiere, but you can make stars—and the moon—be your audience as you take her on an outdoor movie night or even head to a drive-in. Pop out some popcorn or champagne, and she’ll definitely have a great time. It’s cheaper and way more romantic.

#3 Whisk her off to an island getaway. Online couponing sites have a plethora of deals to suit every occasion and location, so take advantage of this to save on your travel and accommodation costs. Plan a romantic trip months ahead, and you’ll be sure to save 50% to 75% on your costs. Ride off into the sunset with her on a private island, and she won’t know how much you’ve saved using your coupons. [Read: 8 tips to have a great time when you travel as a couple]

#4 Take advantage of deals and coupons. Take a cue from #3, and subscribe to online coupon and deals sites to always be updated with the latest from merchants you both love, whether it is for out-of-town or out-of-the-country vacations, hotel staycations, wellness and facial treatments, or even short lessons you can do together. You can even go a step further and add in a gift you snagged via an online bargain.

#5 Do some research. Instead of whisking her off here and there, and to places you know she probably has gone to already, anyway, why not dig a little deeper and ask her friends about the things your high-maintenance lady love really likes? Although you might be afraid of trying something new, even if the new place has a lot of character, she isn’t going to mind if she truly loves the flavors.

Take her to a hole-in-the-wall Thai place, a newly-opened gourmet pizza joint, a modern gastropub, or an eclectic coffee shop, and see her eyes beam not because you took her somewhere expensive, but because you took the time to know what she likes. [Read: 7 date ideas men love but women actually hate]

#6 Go local. Check your community events for plays and other things that may interest her. You may not have enough to buy her tickets to concerts and theater plays, but you can take her out on a community theater’s take on Les Miserables or maybe even dance together while attending a concert of an up-and-coming local band. [Read: 12 getting ready tips for guys going out for a date]

#7 Stay home. Staying home is also a great option. Cook together, watch a movie, play board games, work out, or even teach each other a new hobby as an affordable way to go on a date; it can bring the two of you closer together.

She may be high-maintenance, but you can always try to stay out of the traditional date bandwagon, and give the two of you a great time in a comfortable place where you can both be yourselves and avoid the hassle of waiting in lines.

#8 Rein in some reinforcements. Do you have a friend who can give you a free pass to VIP seats at the hippest clubs? Do you have a cousin who can give you discount rates at her favorite shops, restaurants, hotels, and resorts? Do you have a bartender or waiter friend who can give you good tables and freebies? It’s time to take advantage of your connections and ring in some favors to your advantage—you may even impress your girl.

#9 Go historic. Whether you take her to a museum, an exhibit, an historical landmark, or even just show her something from your own family history, she will appreciate it if you share something that you hold dear. Even if it’s not all glitz and glamour, and the ancestral house you showed her is a tad too dusty, you can spend the rest of the day telling her your amazing family history, or just laugh your heads off at the funny-looking trinkets and the even-goofier tour guide.

#10 Give her a breath of fresh air. You may not have everything that she’s used to, but you can always keep her excited and delighted by giving things a fresh perspective with your own budget-friendly, yet thoughtful twist. Take her outdoors even if she’s not used to living only with the bare necessities. Who knows? She might end up enjoying it, after all. [Read: 8 romantic gestures from the olden days that all girls miss]

Many people are intimidated by the idea of dating a high-maintenance woman. Perhaps it is because of the many misconceptions and stereotypes associated with the term. Marilyn Monroe, a self-professed high-maintenance woman, defines it perfectly: “I am feisty, impatient, I make mistakes, and I am cranky when I don’t sleep. I am out of control and, at times, hard to handle. If you can’t handle me at my worst, then you probably don’t deserve me at my best.”

Love isn’t cheap—whether or not you are dating a high-maintenance woman. The secret to pulling off a date within your budget is to plan it carefully, be sincere about it, and–more importantly–be creative. There’s nothing like creativity to stretch your dollar—and there’s nothing like sincerity to make your woman feel special and loved.

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Tiffany Reyes
Tiffany Grace Reyes
Tiffany is a wordsmith who has played with words ever since her letter-to-the-editor was published nationally at the age of 9. Since then her writing has gone f...
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3 thoughts on “How to Date a High-Maintenance Girl without Going Broke”

  1. Thread says:

    Dated a girl like that. She literally said, flat out, that she was low maintenance. Very emphatically. I’m a trusting guy, so I took her word for it. Little did I realize that when someone has to emphatically convince you of something before you get a chance to find out for yourself, it’s usually an indicator that they’re lying. Anyway, it came out bit by bit that she was not carefree, she was not low maintenance, she was not easy to please. I had to find it out experimentally, by feeling like shit any time I did something for her and she made it plain that it wasn’t good enough. It didn’t matter that I had made the gesture, that I had been thinking of her. There were times I’d get her a thoughtful gift and she’d just get really disappointed right in front of me and make me feel like a piece of shit. When I say ‘thoughtful gift’ I mean that she was an English Major in college, and I am an avid reader. So I would spend a while in a bookstore racking my brain for a book that she would find interesting, that would be relevant to her interests but also fresh and new, that she would really get something out of reading. She’d open it and go “Oh. A book.” I found out later from her best friend (who I was also close with) that she had been expecting jewelry. I was a poor college kid, and she had made it plain that nobody else in the world ‘got’ her sense of style, and that it was entirely futile to buy clothing or accessories for her because no matter what they were never quite her ‘style’ and she’d never wear it. She specifically said this to me, citing examples of her mom buying her birthday presents and Christmas presents and being told they would have to be returned because she didn’t like them (Which, I eventually let her know I thought was really shitty of her, and she got defensive and said ‘what, should I have lied?’ YES. Jesus, lie if you have to, don’t make someone feel like their gift was shitty). So of course I took her word for it and didn’t go spend hundreds of dollars on a gift I had every reason to expect she’d not like. Then, for example, early on in the relationship I talked about not liking Valentine’s Day, because it seemed so forced and silly. Why does there need to be one day that everyone has to scramble to throw together a cheesy romantic experience? Who schedules romance? I’d much rather have these things be off-the-cuff and spontaneous. She said she agreed and thought the whole thing was overdone. So for Valentine’s Day I just got us some Chinese carryout and sat in bed watching one of our favorite movies and cuddling. Turns out that what she had really wanted was a fancy dress-up date at a nice restaurant, and also a gift (jewelry please?). So no, despite her protestations she was NOT low maintenance. This got really long. I just needed to get it off my chest. So happy to be single now.

  2. shameship says:

    A high maintenance girl is one that demands attention (not a bad thing), money (not a bad thing in itself), things (baubles, shinies) not a totally bad thing either. Here’s the bad part. She contributes only the bare minimum. She’s in the relationship when other people are around, but only to the extent that it’s convenient for her. She contributes nothing to the household (for those that are married) except a pretty face. Her self worth is determined completely by the way she looks and how other people perceive her. She only buys clothes that are the brands that other people will recognize. She doesn’t do any domestic duties whatsoever. She has no job, but still manages to spend more than anyone else in the house every month. It’s bad because life with these types of people is vapid. It’s totally superficial. There is almost nothing beyond the looks. The only thing she contributes are things that make life harder. Demands of time, money and things always outstrip contributions. When she gets older, it’s only going to get more expensive. Plastic surgery to maintain the looks get expensive, and the mood swings and other mental shit that you’ll have to deal with will become unbearable. This is one of the MANY reasons dating/marrying someone whose self worth is determined by her looks is a BAD thing. Looks go away, intelligence and personality may change, but at least they are THERE.

  3. sess says:

    It’s like this. A girl is high maintenance if you have to do things to keep the relationship working. If I have to call or text her every single day to keep things running smoothly that is maintenance. The more things along these lines that I have to do for us to “work” measures a girls maintenance. Now I have no problem texting my girlfriend every day, in fact it is rather normal. What happens when I miss a day or two? Is that okay, is it okay for me to have enjoyable fulfilling days without checking in? I see the ideas of make up and clothes coming up in this thread. Personally I don’t believe these things have anything to do with being high maintenance. These things can however be an indicator. A red flag. Just something that draws attention to a possible personality trait. You spending a lot of time on your appearance does not really effect me and some days I kind of like, so I wouldn’t worry about this aspect. High maintenance can be a turn off because of the toll it takes on someone. Like running in sports. In soccer, fitness is hugely important. It is very difficult to be effective without some level of mobility and fitness. At practices some coaches focus on running and fitness trying to make their athletes just out will their opponents. Intelligent coaches find ways to work fitness into the normal training which is generally more fun. This way athletes understand when to run more importantly why they run. Running for the sake of running is frustrating and tiresome. In a relationship there some thing I give and something I get. The times I am running are the times I am giving. I want to understand why I am giving this gesture at this time. If you’re only reason is to stroke an ego that is not a good reason. Sometimes I like running because I can get something out of it. Perhaps I see space forward and I know a little extra effort here or their will pay off huge. The obvious metaphor I am not making is scoring because you’ll read that as sex. That is not what I mean. Sometimes the extra effort I put in for you (my teammate) makes me feel good for just having done it. Sometimes I do it for you because I know the consequences cost more than the effort. Still I must be allowed to express myself out there. That is why it is a turn off. It is running for no known purpose.

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