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How to Make Your Ex Want You Back By Undoing the Damage First

how to make your ex want you back

Figuring out how to make your ex want you back depends on how you lost them to begin with. How did they slip away from you in the first place?

Love sometimes comes, and sometimes it goes. If yours is gone and you want to know how to make your ex want you back, first figure out why you lost them to begin with.

How to make your ex want you back: 6 scenarios and the ways

Breakups suck. I am just going to put it out there. Whether you broke up or they did, it didn’t happen without complex feelings and emotions on both sides.

Understanding how to make your ex want you back depends on the reasons you lost them in the first place. So, I will outline for you the reasons you lost them and the way to make them want you back.

#1 You chose someone else. If you lost your ex because you either chose someone over them or you cheated on them, you face a whole lot of carnage that’s difficult to reverse.

Making your ex want you back will involve turning back the hand of time to undo the harm and hurt you caused, which may or may not be possible. To win someone back who you hurt by betraying or letting them go, there is going to be a lot of trust that needs to be rebuilt.

The first step is to apologize and take responsibility for your actions. The rest is going to be an uphill battle to prove to them that you really are sorry, and you changed your ways and won’t ever do it again. [Read: Learn how to forgive yourself for cheating]

#2 You got too comfortable. If they left you because you let yourself go, then focus on being the most awesome you ever. When you get comfortable in a relationship, it isn’t uncommon for someone to stop trying to please the other and making the special effort either to look good for them or to do nice things for them.

If you let yourself go and gained the first year fifteen, hit the gym. If you just stopped hanging out or communicating, find ways to make contact and develop the friendship you once had. The key is to be the person that they fell in love with, not the person they fell out of love with. [Read: 10 things you do that sabotage your love life]

#3 You were selfish. If now that you broke up, you see you weren’t exactly the best partner and really want to try again, then it isn’t going to be easy to convince them that you are different now and see the error of your ways. Unfortunately, that old saying of “you don’t know what you’ve got until it is gone” is true.

If you didn’t know that you had the greatest thing ever and now want to have it again, be honest and tell them. You can’t make someone want you back. You can tell them you are sorry you took them for granted, and you are falling apart without them.

They might miss you too. If you didn’t treat them right, the only way to get them to want you back is going to be to put yourself out there for rejection and see what happens. [Read: 15 traits that sets selfless love apart from selfish love]

#4 You were too young at the time. If you broke up with your ex because it was the right person wrong time scenario, there might be residual feelings left. When time passes, and you date other people, sometimes you realize you left someone in your past that you shouldn’t have.

If time has passed and you took time to reflect, mature, and date around, and you simply can’t find anyone better, then put it out there to see if they feel the same. Find a way to run into them, hit them up on social media, or just send a private message to start a conversation and see if there are feelings there.

#5 They left you for someone else. I hate to say it, and you might not want to hear it, but once a cheat, always a cheat. I don’t even feel like I should give you the advice to get them back, but I will. My best advice is to let it be and find someone worthy of your love and effort.

There are so many fish in the sea. Why focus on the one who didn’t love you enough to stay faithful? If you make them want you back, how will you ever know that they aren’t going to do it again?

Wanting back a bad ex is just that, bad. Instead focus on getting some other NICE guy or girl to want you instead of wasting your efforts on someone so obviously flawed. [Read: Is it really possible to get back with a cheater?]

#6 You were oil, and they were vinegar. Maybe don’t try. Sometimes breakups just happen. Once we get over them, it isn’t uncommon to think they were the best thing ever and forget the roller coaster ride that led you to the end. If you broke up because you just couldn’t ever end the battle, consider that even if you miss them, things weren’t right.

You can’t ever go back. Even if you win them back, the honeymoon phase will likely be overshadowed quickly by reminders of why it didn’t work the first time. Instead of trying to make your ex want you back, think twice about why you broke up, the real reason, and decide if you want to go through that heartache again.

Losing a relationship is difficult anyway it happens. If you wonder how to get your ex back, you can’t make someone want you back through scheming, plotting, planning, or manipulation. The only way to honestly know how to make your ex want you back, is by trying to undo any damage you caused and being honest and finding out if there are some feelings still left.

[Read: The 10 signs you should get back with your ex]

Understanding how to get your ex back means no games! If they weren’t good for you to begin with, don’t play with fire. The best way to rekindle a relationship is with an apology and seeing something for what it really was, not what you wanted it to be.

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Julie Keating
Julie Keating

A writer isn’t born, but created out of experiences. No lack of subject matter, my life reads more like fiction than anything that could have been imagined...

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