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Falling in Love with a Friend

falling in love with a friend

Falling in love with a friend can happen naturally and unexpectedly. But what can you do about it? If you really are falling in love with a friend and want that friend to love you back, these tips are all you need!

Before you go any further about falling in love with a friend and making a move on your friend, click here to read the introduction and find out if you truly are falling for a friend out of love or just physical attraction.

Once you’re certain that you’re truly falling in love with a friend, and it’s not just a fling thing that you want out of physical attraction, you need to prepare yourself for the real twist in the tale.

Falling in love with a friend

Going out with a friend is something that needs a lot of thought.

And if your friendship does mean a lot to you, think a while before making a move on a friend.

Never forget that a relationship with a friend would never be the same if you ever split up someday.

In most cases, friendships always have a way of twisting itself towards love or emotional affairs, so if you’re falling in love with a friend and want to make a move, do so with your own neck on the line.

Figure your feelings

Ask yourself one last time, are the feelings you have for your friend truly love, is it purely lust, or is it because of an emotional upheaval in your life?

Sometimes, you could misinterpret your feelings when you feel more attached to them all of a sudden, or feel jealous when they start going out with someone else. Be true to yourself about the origin of your feelings.

You really wouldn’t want to propose only to find out in a couple of weeks that you really weren’t in love, and it was just a big crush.

Speak your heart

Hey, it’s your friend we’re talking about right? So just speak your heart out and let them know exactly what you feel. Never go straight in and tell them you love them. Instead, hint to your friend about how perfect your life could be if the both of you could start seeing each other. [Read: How to know if a guy likes you]

Do it as cautiously as possible. Take a few days or even weeks to express yourself, because rushing into it would only make the blow unexpected and harder to face for your friend.

I mean, come on, it’s not everyday that they come across a friend who is falling in love with a friend, right? But on that final day when you feel your friend’s warmed up to hearing the words from the horse’s mouth, open your mouth and neigh!

Don’t push your friend

Now, falling in love with a friend is risky, you obviously know you’re taking a chance. And as with every other bet, there’s a good chance that you may even lose.

At times, your friend may just not be willing to look at you as anything more than just a friend. Unfortunately, you have to accept their decision. On the other hand, your friend may just burst out laughing or may even freak out. Give them time to make up their mind. They too may have feelings for you, but probably have never thought about it. So wait.

It may take a while before they could give you any sort of an affirmation.

The fork in the path

Ouch… this is probably the hardest part of falling in love with a friend and confessing it. If it goes well for you, you may be the happiest person, but if it goes otherwise, then your friendship is definitely in for a new fork in the road. You may be separated and there may be certain awkwardness in your relationship (which can be healed back to normal with time) or you may even feel too embarrassed to face each other again, which means the end of the road for your relationship.

So what really happens next?

What happens next is entirely left to how either of you feel about each other. It may turn out good or it may take a worse turn. I’ve been in these heart pounding moments too. And guess what? I still haven’t really hooked up with any one of my friends.

Somehow it just didn’t feel right after that incident with my best friend years ago. But, on the other hand, if I ever did come across that perfect friend who can blow me off my feet after I’ve weighed him with the pros and cons, I’d jump right into his arms even before he completes his proclamation of love. There’s no question about that.

Admit it, when one of you starts looking at the other as something more than just a friend, the relationship has changed already, hasn’t it? And every now and then, someone’s always falling in love with a friend.

Do understand that falling in love with a friend is natural, but it’s not always romantic love from both sides.

Falling in love with a friend is that stage when you can’t change it, nor can you get over it. So all I can say is, irrespective of whether it works out or not, try holding on and be there for each other. What’s the difference between lovers and best friends anyways? Just the fact that you get to pull down your mate’s pants when you’re both lovers!

On the other hand, when you’re just friends, you don’t really have to bother with the damn pants, you can still pull their leg!

But all said and done, I know that sometimes, you just can’t help falling in love with a friend. So if that spark does ignite and you have to confess your love, go ahead. But keep it simple and don’t ever let it come as a surprise. Drop a few hints now and then, and take a look at this feature, I’m in love with my best friend, which does give you a few sneaky ways to let your friend know that you’re falling in love with them.

So if you find yourself falling in love with a friend, learn how to drop those hints and make a move at the right time. We’ll keep our fingers crossed for you!

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23 thoughts on “Falling in Love with a Friend”

  1. vinu says:

    I don’ think falling in love with a friend is such a good idea unless you are sure he/she won’t refuse you. You can make your friendship awkward by doing this.

  2. Onyx says:

    This is all true and well, but personally, I think there is a bigger difference in being a lover than just taking off the other person’s pants and getting them into bed.

    There’s a special kind of intimacy and feeling with someone you love. It’s a wonderful experience that I personally think is worth the risk.

    I fell in love with my best friend. And it was the best thing in the world that happened to me. We are still together to this day. I honestly think it wasn’t due to luck, but more with the courage that I had when I confessed. They had to think about it for a while… it was a very nervewrecking moment in time for me… but it worked out.

    Did you know that 90% of heartbreaks are due to both parties not telling each other that they liked each other? That’s just how it is.

    And I quote:

    A freind is someone who asks if their is anything they can do.
    A lover is someone who does something becuase they care.
    A friend is someone who knows something is bothering you.
    A lover is someone who knows and does something to make you feel better.
    A friend is someone who enjoys hearing about things going on in your life.
    A lover is someone who adds to your life and shares life with you.

  3. Sasha Gallegos says:

    I fall in love with my best friend. We were inseparable that I was almost sure he feels the same for me. I give him some hints and then confessed I am falling in live with him. He told me that he loves me so much but just as a best friend. I got hurt even though he told me this so nicely but I couldn’t help not being hurt. I tried to avoid him because I was embarrassed to see him or talk to him after what I did because I am conservative person and never imagined in my life that I would confess to someone and get this result. Anyway, he always try to keep in contact and pretend as if nothing happens and he still tell me all his secrets and ask for my advise as before but I don’t know what to do. Do I keep our relationship like this even though I feel completely different. Sometimes I doubt that he told me the truth that he doesn’t love back and sometimes I just say to hurt yourself again and just move on but how I can while he wanna keep it likes and doesn’t care about how I feel. He told me once that he will not let anything can separate our friendship.

  4. coco says:

    dear sasha:
    i’ve been trough what u have been,but the other way around!
    i have this best friend of mine,which i like and love alot!!he confessed to wanting to go for something more with me!but i said that we should better stay as friends!!i was scared the sh*t out of myself that he would do what u r doing!!he didint though!we have bacame very very much more closer!!!i think maybe i kinda like him even more!!dont cut him out!there is nothing to be embaresed!he is ur friend so he totally understands!!i am soo glad my friend didnt cut me out!!
    me saying no to him,means one thing only:he means wayyy more to me,that i am scared i might lose what we have,simply by wanting more!!
    act likr before!everything will be fine!

  5. A Friend says:

    Hi, I am hopelessly in love with my friend , he told me from the start he didnt want a relationship but after 10 months of sleeping everynight together I have got emotionally involved and find myself not coping ,please help he still is the same I think he cares for me but want admit it help why are men so hard , we have now stopped sleeping together as he finally realised I was falling for him HELP

  6. Keith says:

    I fall in love my best friend. I confessed to her and she rejected me.She told me that it is best for us to remain as friends. Now, she is trying to avoid me. I know things are getting awkward. I am afraid of losing this friendship which started 4 years ago and now she is into another man. What can I do? I guess there is a strong barrier between us after this confession failed. Is there anything I can do to improve this situation and any ways for me to hide my feelings toward her when I see her again…

  7. confused says:

    i’ve been in love with a really good friend for a long time now, it never worked out because we were both in relationships, it got to the point where we didnt talk for years, she was dating an asshole who i couldnt stand, and i was in a fairly healthy loving relationship, now we hang around all the time, shes been in a relationship with someone for a few years now, but she isnt happy with him, she talks to me about it all the time. it really hurts because i like the guy, hes not a bad friend or anything, its just hes not right for her, he doesnt realize it and neither does she. she knows how i feel about her, and shes always hinting around that if she left him she would want me. what the hell should i do about this situation, i just got out of an 8 year relationship because someone was driving a wedge between us, and i dont want to put that guy through the same shit i went through. yet when i see her cry about the way he treats her it tears me apart. should i keep it the way it is or should i try harder to be with her?

  8. Brandon says:

    I have liked my best friend for a while now i told her how i felt and she said she just sees me as a friend. I was hooked on her for a while waiting for my chance then i tried to move on. i dated this other girl for a while and after we broke up my best friend started liking me. she didnt tell me till after my X and i got back together. when we broke up again i asked her out and told her how i felt and she said she dont feel the same way. I’m so confused! When i mess with her like saying “I really wanna kiss you” she would say Ohhhh getting ideas. Im so confused should i just go for it? she means a lot to me.

  9. Smiley says:

    I’ve been in love with my friend for quite sometime now. Though i realized it very late. I also made sure if it was just a crush or if i was mistaking any other feeling as love. I still have not confessed to him. Since we both live in separate countries it’s all the more hard to tell him. I always mess up when we chat or mail. It’s just that there are so many things going through my head that i’m not able to say the right things. Later on i’d look back and think ‘Oh! I could have said that or asked that’. I always tell myself to calm down and think thoroughly before writing but it’s the same cycle every time. I’ve a habit of telling him almost everything so when i think too much and hold myself back i become miserable. Since i can’t flirt at all, it makes matters even more worse. Please Help

  10. John says:

    I liked this girl and talked to her for a month or so. Always had a crush on her. Well she got back together with a old boyfriend and he was jealous of my friendship with her so we cut ties. 2 yrs later (now) A coworker became a friend on facebook. I found out she wasn’t with the jerk anymore. Well we started walking together and talking about everything and she says she doesn’t want anything. We had sex one night after drinking. I fell head over heels for her and we still talk about life while we walk. But I find myself wanting her more and more and care for her so much it sucks! sorry if this isn’t relevant I was putting it out there.

  11. Steven says:

    It’s been well over a year since i told my friend how i truly felt. She was surprised needless to say and told me she had to back away, i was hurt because we’ve been friends for years i weed there when she was feeling low and she we there for me, and to go from talking everyday to completely stopping was horrible. A year passed and life as it does went on, but i never forgot about her and promised myself i would never ruin another friendship like that. I moved on and I’m dating someone else when out of the blue my old friend connects me and went to meet up. I decided to go, i even had a game plan to act like nothing ever happened and to just be friendly and kinda cold cause i was still a little hurt. She told me that night that she felt the same way i did back then but was shocked at what i said. She’s with the guy she told me about a year ago but still thought about me all the time. I honestly don’t know what to do, as soon i looked her in those beautiful eyes all my feelings came rushing back to me, but I’m with someone and she’s with someone, please any advice would help

  12. mplo says:

    From what I understand, love is friendship that’s caught on fire. Often people who meet become very good friends and then gradually fall in love. Love is there, but the friendship also has to continue as well, in order for the relationship to really work.

  13. bunny says:

    its alot complicated.. !! i have a friend who is very close to me and he is going through a bad time . he got dumped by his girlfriend. so i do all possible efforts to make him feel at best. i feel that i am getting too attached , i cant stay away ,i cant see him in grief. i am already dating someone but i have these confused feelings about him, at times i feel that even he is getting more attached to me. we just cant stay away for long. i never thought that things will turn out like this. i feel good spending more time with my friend than with my boyfriend. i don’t know what my friend feels about it exactly , is he also going through the same phase? and if yes, i am so confused what to do because i feel bad to cheat on my boyfriend & i can’t imagine to hurt my friend if he also feels for me. i have no clue what mess i am entering into. please HELPPP !!

  14. Abby says:

    Me and my best friend have been friends for almost 6 yrs now and a little over a month ago we started flirting with each other staying up all night talk and then we started sexting about 3 weeks ago we went to 3rd base it kinda just happened and since then its happened about 2 more times we’ve kissed and all and sometimes we’ll just lay in his bed and just not say anything just enjoying each other or fall a sleep next to one another we haven’t really talked about it but I kinda want to know whats going on and to talk about it because I’m really falling for him but I dont know how to I hate being the kind of girl who is like so what are we or I kinda like you so if you can give some advise that would be great

  15. Jon says:

    Yes I met this girl in HighSchool in 1987 on the bus the first day of school that year. From the first time I ever saw her my heart skip a beat we graduated in 89 together I have had a crush and we have all ways been great friends but she has been married to somebody elsea and me to. For 27 years I have all ways had her in my mind I am in love with her and single and she is in a relation or to ship with somebody and not happy. When I spend time with her at her work she wants me to rub her back and we have been out on a date after church and there was so much eye contact. This woman makes me very happy but I don’t know if she is playing me are for real I love this beautiful woman so much that it is hurting me not to be her one and only .

  16. Antonio says:

    I first met this girl in 1985 when she was dating a friend of mine. I was taken with her immediately but never told her then. We both dated others and all hung out for 2 years and were good friends. Her and I both moved away to other parts of the country and met and married other people and had kids. I have always reached out to her and kept in contact periodically over the years. My wife left me in 2013 after over 20 years of marriage. And this girl has been divorced twice and is now single. However she is going through another heartbreak from a man she loved that is playing with her heart and loves another woman. Now we find ourselves back in the same city together and we have become very close friends. We text and call each other almost daily and see each other almost weekly. We have gone out to dinner and hang out at each others homes occasionally. We have deep spiritual and intellectual discussions. But we also laugh and play music that is good for the soul. We have been helping each other through the hardest times of our lives. We tell each other everything and have been doing this for well over a year now. We have so much in common even the dating sites that we are on keep matching us up. The year prior my wife ran off and I lost my Mother, and my best friend to cancer, and now this beautiful woman that I’ve had a crush on for 30 years IS my best friend. And then after a year it hit me like a ton of bricks, I fell in love with her. I truly believe this woman is my soul mate. I can’t stop thinking of her, listening to her problems, doing things for her, buying gifts for her and helping her in ANY way I can. I am loyal and devoted and have always been a one woman man. I have been showing her how a real man in loves treats a woman rather than the heartbreaking players she has been dating and falling for. And since we keep no secrets from each other I came out and said it, “I’m falling for you and I can’t help it”. My little crush of 30 years has grown into something larger than life. She completely rejects that notion and says she doesn’t want to ruin the friendship and always keeps me at arms length. I think her heart has hardened over the years with abusive and unfaithful men. But I am heartbroken and more depressed than ever. I have never fallen in love with a woman I’ve never been intimate with, ever! Even though I think she is the most beautiful woman I have ever known, I purely fell in love with this woman’s soul and it’s hurts that I have to live with the fact that I can never touch her, hold her hand, lay with her with arms wrapped and never make love to her. I’m still a good looking man of my age, but she keeps finding younger men to date. And I’m right here with my arms wide open. She wants me to find another woman and I have a hard time dating other women because all I want is her. We are both in our 50’s and I thought God and fate had a hand in throwing us back together after a lifetime apart. Even my daughter looks to her daughter as a big sister. Why does everything seem so perfect and right to me but not her? I’m so confused and can’t stop crying over this and all the other tragedy in my life. I’m sorry I made her feel guilty over my falling for her and my depression, I didn’t want that to happen, and I didn’t really want to fall in love with her to begin with, I was afraid. But she just filled a big hole in my heart at a time I needed it most. I think it goes back to 1985 and subconsciously I’ve always wanted her. I’ve never felt like this or been in a position like this before. But we are still friends (although I think this changed our friendship somehow) and I still need her in my life no matter how heartbreaking it is for me. I can’t wait another 30 years, I feel a Pandora’s box has been opened and I can’t get her out of my heart. She will always be the one that got away. I now have to force myself to find another an resign myself to settle.

  17. Emma says:

    I’m starting to fall for my closest friend. He once promised that no matter what happens, we will stay friends. But I’m having the feeling that he might break that promise once I tell him that I love him not only as friend , but something more. And that’s not the only problem, before I fell in love with with him, we were so close, and he told me that we are more than friends, and he started calling me his sister, which means, our relationship is more than being just friends, but nothing more than being brothers and sisters. Another thing is that one of my friends also like him, and i have the feeling that he likes her too. And my feelings for him just gets on growing stronger and stronger now that he puts his arm on my shoulders, he lays his head on my shoulders and holds my hand whenever were together.

  18. Hollowstar says:

    I’ve been friends with another girl for a while now, and we’ve always been quite close and fairly touchy-feely. Recently, I discovered I had feelings for her. I don’t know if she feels the same way about me or if she just sees me as a close friend, but she tends to, I don’t know if it’s even intentionally or romantically, flirt from time to time. She is panromantic, while I am biromantic, and I found this out after I had a crush on her, so it made me wonder if I had a chance with her or if she feels the same way about me. I’m really nervous about admitting my feelings to her in case she doesn’t feel the same way…

  19. Missy says:

    This totally happened to me and it really sucks. I didn’t see it coming, but what do you expect when you bare your heart and soul to someone??

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