Everyone is dying to know the answer to the question, are soulmates real? Are they real? And how do you know that this person is your soulmate?
But hold up, before we get into the argument of are soulmates real, what exactly is a soulmate? Well, the New Oxford American states that a soulmate is “a person ideally suited to another as a close friend or romantic partner.” Sounds pretty simple, however, I don’t think so. It’s a little more complex than that.
Soulmates are not just someone that suits us, soulmates are associated with having a deeper connection to one another, a connection that cannot be replicated. It’s that person, the one that clicks, you’ve heard about “the click.” Well, that’s a soulmate. [Read: The 20 signs you need to look for in a soulmate connection]
Are soulmates real?
So now that you know what a soulmate is, what’s the big debate? Well, does it even exist?
This is a pretty big debate, the question of whether soulmates are real or not. Some scientists say that it’s impossible, with the help of mathematical equations, to have a soulmate. In addition, others argue that you shouldn’t even think about soulmates since you then eliminate other eligible partners because you’re looking for “the one.” I’m not saying I agree, but they have a valid point.
On the other hand, scientists believe soulmates are probable, but not in the way we think of them. You don’t need an immediate click with someone, rather, soulmates result from a deep love that develops over time.
Who’s right? No one really knows. However, if you’re wondering whether your partner is your “soulmate,” there are some good signs which show that you and your partner are a perfect match.
#1 You speak without words. Okay, I know, that sounds a little New Age, a little hippy, but it’s true. You don’t have to constantly talk like you would with people that you just met. Share that comfortable silence without any awkward feelings. When you talk, you finish each other’s sentences without even blinking. You connect on a mental level unlike other people. [Read: 15 sweet gestures that express love without words]
#2 You feel it. You feel it deep down in your gut when you know someone is for you. When I go on dates with guys, I know within five minutes if this guy is for me or not. Of course, sometimes they surprise me. However, usually I’m right. It’s not really explainable, the feeling, you just know that this person is or is not for you. [Read: 12 very real signs of true, unending love in a relationship]
#3 You two made chemistry. The chemistry you have for each other is intense. Sure, you’ve felt things for other people but this is on a whole other level. Though your sexual chemistry is high, it’s more than just having sex, there’s passion and love with each touch.
#4 There’s a challenge. You challenge each other and push each other in a positive way. There’s a sense of teamwork shared between you two and neither feels as though they’re forgotten. You both want to evolve and grow with each other, supporting what you both do. This isn’t just being soulmates, this is a partnership.
#5 It just flows. You’re not worried about saying something offensive to them or doing something that would make you look weird. You don’t care. You feel completely comfortable around them from the first day. You feel free to say what you want and it’s almost like you’ve known each other for years.
#6 You’re both flawed and you know it. Yes, you’re flawed, they’re flawed and you both know it. This isn’t about finding someone who’s in a perfect package, smiling all the time and doing everything exactly right. That’s not what a soulmate is, that’s a doll.
You both see each other’s flaws but accept them and embrace them in the relationship. A soulmate is about having the perfect relationship, it’s about going through the ups and downs together. [Read: 16 secrets to a perfectly happy relationship]
#7 They make you feel calm. And you make them feel calm. You shouldn’t feel stressed out when you’re around them, that’s not a partnership. You want to feel safe and relaxed in your soul, as though everything is where it should be. If you’re on pins and needles the entire time you’re around them, that isn’t a soulmate.
#8 You both agree on the important things. Okay, he leaves the toilet seat up and it drives you crazy. You always chew with your mouth open, yes, these things are annoying but they’re not crucial for the relationship. You both agree on the fundamentals of your relationship. What you value in life is what your partner values, you see the world through the same scope.
#9 You can be honest with them. You want to be able to tell your partner how you really feel. With a soulmate, you should be able to tell your partner everything that’s on your mind. If you’re feeling judged for thinking or believing a certain thing, that’s not a partnership. A soulmate, though, may not agree with you, will let you say what you say without judgment.
#10 Your soulmate may not end up in a romantic form. You may have found your soulmate, however, there isn’t any sexual chemistry between you. Of course, you mentally and emotionally connect, and you may have even tried to have a sexual relationship with this person but it may not work out. That doesn’t mean you didn’t find your soulmate. You did, it’s just that romantic aspect isn’t there. [Read: 10 ways to build sexual chemistry in any relationship and make it stay!]
#11 It may not be an immediate falling in love. I know people that married friends that they’ve known for ten years. One day, they just looked at each other and realized that their soulmate was in front of them the whole time. You may be thinking that your soulmate is someone you’ll meet at a party or library, but really, it could even be your neighbor across the hall or your best friend.