Breaking up sucks. Even if you wanted it, there’s a part of you that aches. But if you just broke up, try these 13 things to help mend your heart.
I never handle breakups well, even when I’m the one who wants them. After I just broke up, I spend my days moping around the house, wearing the same clothes for days on end and rewinding every moment in my head thinking that maybe I made a mistake. And, of course, throw in some emotional eating and that’s what the next couple months after my breakup looks like.
Let’s just say, I really take advantage of the situation to be lazy and eat buckets of ice cream and fried chicken. It’s like watching the unmotivated version of Bridget Jones’s Diary. [Read: 8 post-breakup questions you should consider]
What to do after you just broke up with your partner
Listen, you don’t have to be like that if you just broke up. In fact, it’s probably better for your arteries if you didn’t go all out like I do. When you just broke up, you experience a lot of emotions, most of them mixed. Putting you on the edge to drunk text them or post a sappy song on Facebook.
But why don’t we make this experience easier on you? There are a few things to do to help you get through a breakup. A few things that make it a learning experience rather than a Spanish soap opera. It’s gonna be hard, but you’ll pull through.
#1 Know it’s okay to be sad. Maybe you’re known in your group of friends to be the “tough one.” I’m not even sure what that means since everyone has emotions. So, if you’re sad, be sad. You don’t have to pretend that you don’t care. If anything, it’ll just be more obvious to people that you do care. So, be honest with yourself. [Read: 15 sad romantic movies to help you move on]
#2 Clean your room. I know you might think it’s a weird time to clean your room, but trust me, clean it. It’s easy to feel depressed when your room is a mess. Give it a solid cleaning, it makes you not only feel better, but it shows you that you can start fresh. This means to give your sheets a washing as well. [Read: 14 steps to get over someone you love]
#3 Have a good cry. This is really important. Many people suppress their emotions. Listen, they’re going to come out eventually and most likely when you’re stressed at school or during a business meeting. Overall, it’s better to take some time to sit at home and have a good cry. Just get all those tears out.
#4 Accept that it happened. I know you have some hope left inside of you that they’ll take you back or come back to you, but don’t. At least for now. Accept that it happened. You are broken up. If they come back, great but don’t wait for them. You only delay the healing process. [Read: How deal with your broken heart and crawl out of the pit]
#5 Remove your ex from social media. This is probably the time when you stalk them like crazy which is even more of a reason for you to delete and remove them from all forms of social media. It’s going to be hard, but by not having them as a reminder everywhere you move on quicker.
#6 Get selfish. This is the time to focus on yourself and doing things that make you feel good. Join the class you always wanted to take, go to the movies, hang out with friends. I don’t care what it is, as long as it makes you feel good. It’s time to focus on yourself and give yourself love.
#7 Get a new, sexy profile pic. It’s time to revamp your social media accounts. You were probably a little tamer because you were taken, but you’re single now, remember? So, why not post a brand new sexy picture of yourself showing you all glowed up. You need to show your ex what they miss.
#8 Get that fresh break up look. Cut your hair, get a new outfit, join a gym. Everyone has that moment after a breakup where they just want to start fresh. But take a couple days before doing anything drastic. You know, just in case you were riding the emotional wave. Let yourself cool off and then drastically change your look if you want to. [Read: The 20 life hacks you need to be confidently you]
#9 Go out. You won’t want to go out which is fine for a couple of days or a week. Eventually, you should interact with civilization. This doesn’t mean you’ll have an amazing time, but it’s important to show yourself that life goes on. There are other people out there for you to meet.
#10 Don’t light their things on fire. I know you’ll be tempted to chuck or light on fire personal gifts from them, etc. But don’t. Put them in a box and give them to a friend to hold on to. When you’re older you’ll regret destroying those things because at the end of the day this person was a part of your life. It’s important to look at those items and reflect on who you were then and who you are now. [Read: Old love letters and memories – Should you keep them or burn them?]
#11 Take time. Your friends know you’re sad, so they’ll push you to go out. Like I said before, you need to go out, but this doesn’t mean you should pull a week bender getting drunk every night. It’s perfectly healthy to stay in and watch a movie on your own or with friends. You don’t always need to be in a constant party.
#12 Talk it out. What else are best friends for if not to listen to you when heartbroken? Sit down with your best friend and just spill your heart out. They’re there for you, to support you and be the shoulder to lean on. If you don’t feel comfortable doing that then seeing a therapist or writing in a journal also helps. [Read: 18 ways to build a lasting friendship]
#13 Look at the positives the relationship gave you. Yes, it ended but the relationship taught you a lot, whether a good or bad relationship. You learned about yourself and what you look for in a partner. This isn’t easy. It may make you upset when you think about the time you spent with them, but look at your relationship as a life experience.