How to French Kiss: The Dos and Don’ts of French Kissing

how to french kiss

Is there a wrong way to slip someone the tongue? Absolutely! Read on to learn how to avoid having a cow tongue and how to French kiss the right way.

Have you ever had someone tell you not to slip them the tongue after engaging in a smooch-fest? We hate to be the bearers of bad news, but if this has ever happened to you, you could probably use some pointers on French kissing! But don’t panic. We have all the tricks you could ever need for how to French kiss the *right* way and have your lover coming back for more.

Whether you’re licking your lips, swirling your tongue around theirs, or you’re performing some fantastic oral favors, tongues are visual, mental, and physical turn-ons! When done right, French kissing is one of the most passionate ways to show affection to your partner, and definitely makes for some hot and heavy foreplay. This makes knowing how to use that vessel of love all the more essential, especially since there are so many ways you can have a major kiss-fail when it comes to Frenching! [Read: 11 signs of a bad kisser and 15 foolproof remedies]

We’re looking at some helpful “dos” and “don’ts” on how to French kiss, and which tongue-tastic methods to avoid! Without further ado, let’s get kissing!

Dos and don’ts of French kissing

It shouldn’t be surprising that there are many, many things that can go wrong if you’re trying to French kiss your partner, especially if you are new or unpracticed at it. In fact, many teenagers and adults alike tend to leave the tongue out of their kissing routine, due to a bad experience! Too much tongue, for example, can be a major turn-off. Lack of coordination or confidence can also be a major hit to your technique. That’s why we’re looking at 10 helpful hints on how to French kiss the right way! [Read: 15 kissing techniques for that heartbeat-skipping kiss]

DO: Brush your teeth. There is nothing worse than having someone jam their tongue inside your mouth right after scarfing down a shawarma! Onion breath? No thank you. Do your lover a favor and brush your teeth, rinse with mouthwash, or pop a mint before engaging in spit swapping.

DON’T: Shove your big cow tongue down their throat. Did you know that a cow’s tongue is about a foot long in length? When it comes to learning how to French kiss, never underestimate the importance of the tongue-to-mouth ratio! Nobody likes getting a giant glob of tongue shoved down their throat. Nobody’s getting turned on by that nonsense. [Read: Is your boyfriend a bad kisser? How to pucker him right]

DO: Tease your lover. French kissing should be like long, drawn out foreplay. A big, sexy tease! Instead of ramming your tongue into your lover’s mouth, try doing gentle flicks of your tongue against theirs in between normal kisses. This occasional contact between wet, gliding tongues adds just the right amount of eroticism to your kiss.

DON’T: Drown your partner in saliva. There’s nothing worse than kissing in a horizontal position and having buckets of your lover’s spit fall into your mouth. If your partner wanted a tall glass of water to drink, they’d head to the kitchen and grab one themselves! Do everyone a favor and practice swallowing during your kissing sesh. Hey, it’s just common courtesy!

DO: Keep your tongue soft. A soft tongue rubbing against another soft tongue is beyond a turn-on. Kissing should be fun, so relax and keep your tongue totally chill while making out. A hard tongue may be great for oral, but it sucks for kissing.

DON’T: French kiss like you’re in high school. This means avoiding the following techniques: rubbing your tongues back and forth in a rapid manner and swirling your tongues around in circles like you’re trying to figure out how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop! These are bad, dated techniques that should be done away with immediately. [Read: How to kiss passionately and romantically]

DO: Work on your techniques. The point of French kissing is to build sexual anticipation. Some girls like to take their partner’s tongues into their mouths and suck on it gently, as they would a penis during a BJ! This might seem a little silly at first, but it can certainly get the point across to your man. Just make sure you only throw it in there once during your session in order to keep it feeling fresh.

Other great methods for how to French kiss include using slow, sensual flicks of the tongue, running your tongue across the bottom of their teeth *if they’re clean!* or licking the inside of their bottom lip.

DON’T: Be lazy. Have you ever kissed someone who just wasn’t giving back? A flopping, uncooperative tongue is definitely no fun when it comes to French kissing. If you and your partner are engaging in a heavy make-out session, make sure you’re participating!

DO: Incorporate the rest of your body. Learning how to French kiss has to do with way more than just your tongue. Get your whole body involved. French kissing should be a form of foreplay. It should be a fun, exciting, writhingly good sexual connection with your partner. Incorporate the rest of your body by pressing your bodies up against one another, caressing her breasts, touching her hair and face, or rubbing his penis/cupping his balls through his jeans. This is a great way to have a full-body French kiss. [Read: 11 sexiest hot spots to kiss a woman and arouse her]

DON’T: Doubt yourself. One of the biggest ways you can set yourself into a panic about how well you’re kissing is by doubting your abilities right off the bat. Kissing isn’t like riding a bicycle. Sometimes it takes a bit of practice to know what you like, what you love, and what you absolutely hate! Yes, there may be some hits and misses over time while you try different techniques, but in the end, just do what feels natural, what feels good, and whatever turns you on!

[Read: 12 foolproof kissing tips for a perfectly sexy smooch]

If you’ve ever received a negative comment about your kissing techniques, don’t sweat it. Learning how to French kiss properly definitely takes practice, but with a willing participant, you’ll be on your way to having the most awesome “homework” session ever. Happy kissing!

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Minot Little
Minot Little

Minot Little is a freelance writer who has been getting paid for spreading her sarcastic take on love, life, and sex since 2010. She is many things that peop...

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2 thoughts on “How to French Kiss: The Dos and Don’ts of French Kissing”

  1. moving away says:

    So I’ll cover a few things I like and do when it comes to kissing. Don’t just go all ham with the tongue, its not cool and it gets a little boring. kissing, just like sex is always about mixing it up and keeping it unpredictable and fun. I never start by just jamming my tongue in their mouth. I’ve had that from girls before and it feels… not good, especially if its unexpected. keep it light and then move towards French kissing. don’t stiffen your tongue up too much as its doesn’t feel too good. Don’t go too far into their mouth either. I’ve not experienced it personally but when i was much younger i know a couple of girls who have gagged from a guy literally trying to make out with their tonsils rather than tongues. Remember that kissing shouldn’t be the only thing going on. a lot of the time your hands are moving around doing other stuff. i love it when girls run their hands through my hair. its important to relay the intensity of the situation with your hands. if you’re both wanting each other badly and you cant wait to rip each other clothes of then naturally you’re going to be moving those hands all over… quickly! if its a much slower and kind of more romantic situation then you may move a little slower. in terms of where you should put your hands, that’s up to him/her. try to follow their reactions and see what they like and don’t like. I know a few girls will move my hands to where they want and i love that kind of thing! it means i know this is something she enjoys and I’m always happy to oblige. Also a fun thing I like to do is tease them by pulling back away from a kiss then moving back in and as she goes to kiss me again moving away. Teasing guys and girls is incredibly sexy and building them up for something before delivering it is just as important as the thing itself especially with oral! hope this helps.

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