Whether you’re in a serious relationship or not, it is not uncommon for many of us to get a little antsy during our late twenties and early thirties. We start obsessing over marriage, and more specifically, over each and every detail of the ‘perfect wedding’.
It all starts when more than a few friends post their engagement photos online, and the wedding invitations come rolling in, one after the other. You attend a few weddings, see the beautiful flower arrangements, envy the amazing lace detail on the bride’s dress, and then the whole wedding fantasy quickly begins to snowball.
I can attest to the intensity of wedding fever, which has hit me hard in the last year. I am serious with my boyfriend and I know will we eventually get married. We’ve talked about it, and have already decided we won’t be able to start planning the celebration until we have saved enough money, as neither of our families can help financially, and we definitely don’t want to run ourselves into massive debt.
Yet, even though I know we won’t be married for at least another three years, I cannot stop thinking about all the details of our future wedding. I browse all sorts of wedding pages online, picking out my favourite styles and color schemes. I even drafted up a guest list of our family and friends! I didn’t realize how far I’d gone until I informed my best friend she would be in the wedding party and her response was, “OMG! How and when did he propose?”
Bottom line – he hasn’t officially proposed. I realized then I had almost reached the point of no return. Yes, my boyfriend and I had discussed marriage, but we weren’t officially engaged. While I don’t believe that a ring is necessary to confirm any kind of love that exists between two people, I do believe I was getting ahead of myself. [Read: How to get your guy to propose by reading his mind]
I had officially been struck with wedding fever, and was extremely high on its memorizing excitement. It was easy to ignore the fact that I wouldn’t be married in the too-near future, and instead, just continued to dream on about each and ever aspect of our “eventual” wedding.
25 clear signs you’re high on wedding fever!
I’m sure that many people experience their own case of wedding fever, and different degrees of symptoms, however the following are a list of 25 sure signs you’ve caught wedding fever already!
You definitely have wedding fever if you see more than a few of these signs in your own life. [Read: What is a promise ring and is it really worth giving?]
#1 You aren’t engaged, but are planning to have “the talk” with your partner.
#2 You constantly watch women find their dream wedding dresses on reality TV and cry hysterically in delight, or disgust.
#3 You buy wedding magazines and dog-ear every dress possibility.
#4 You wrote your guest list, and have particular seating arrangements in mind.
#5 You searched wedding planners in your area, and saved their contact details.
#6 At every new event, you scout out its possibility as a venue location.
#7 You religiously Pin hair and beauty options for the big day.
#8 You’ve already chosen your maid of honor and bridesmaids.
#9 You’ve decided the theme of your engagement photos, and your photographer.
#10 You’ve locked down the song for your first dance.
#11 You’ve shamelessly attended wedding cake tastings.
#12 You jot down lines that have wedding vow potential.
#13 You pre-designed a custom engagement ring and matching wedding bands.
#14 You have a few different options in mind for live entertainment.
#15 You dwell over the details of your bridal shower – tea party, brunch or dinner?
#16 You’ve been browsing invitation designs on Etsy, and have contacted a few artists for quotes.
#17 You cry helplessly during any wedding ceremony *real or fictional*.
#18 You’ve prepped your partner on how to approach your parents for approval.
#19 You wake up from alteration nightmares… yet you don’t have a wedding dress.
#20 You’ve memorized the specifics of all the flower arrangements from every wedding you’ve attended, and know exactly what NOT to do.
#21 You’ve contacted the officiant you want to perform your ceremony, just in case their schedule is really packed *for the next five years!*
#22 You’ve browsed and bookmarked the most delicious caterers in your neighbourhood.
#23 You know exactly which stores will be on your registry, and which stores will not!
#24 You have the perfect DIY wedding favors planned!
#25 You’ve visited wedding boutiques, and happened to find yourself trying on a wedding dress or two!
I’m sure many of you can relate to more than a few signs from this list. We’ve all been there, planning and brainstorming our wedding before we have even set a date, or have found Mr. or Mrs. Right. [Read: 5 questions to ask yourself before moving in and 5 questions to ask yourself immediately after moving in with your partner]
The obsession for perfection and weddings
From a very young age, we are led to believe that our wedding will be a key defining moment in our lives, and therefore, it must be absolutely perfect. While a wedding is the first chance for a new couple to announce and celebrate their love and identity together, there doesn’t need to be such an obsession over perfection.
The obsession with perfection is what can lead to such sicknesses as wedding fever. The wedding must have the ideal location, food, flowers, music, etc., while the bride, groom and their parties must be wearing flawless outfits and look like they’ve stepped out of a movie set.
It is these unrealistic expectations that often take the joy out of wedding planning, and the big day itself. With such great pressure for everything and everyone to be absolutely stunning, it can become overwhelming. [Read: What is the right age to get married to ensure a happy future?]
3 essentials to handling wedding fever and getting over it!
There are three essential things that you must remember if you’ve caught wedding fever, or you are about to prepare for your big day.
#1 First, your wedding is first and foremost a celebration of love between you and your partner. That is the biggest and most important element of your wedding. If something is over-shadowing that point, then you need to adjust your approach. The wedding should be less about the over-the-top production and event, and more about the love you and your partner have for each other.
#2 Second, you cannot forget to live in the moment while you obsess over something that will happen years from now. Even if you plan to get married in the near future, you still shouldn’t spend your time brooding over every detail of the big day. You should be enjoying the relationship you have with your partner at this very moment.
While you can dream about your wedding, and discuss initial ideas, don’t let the pre-planning and the idealizing of the perfect day consume you. You will miss out on everything amazing happening right now, even though you aren’t married. [Read: The perfect guide to the perfect DIY wedding proposal]
#3 Third, you need to stop sweating every single detail. Is anyone really going to notice if you have light blue floral arrangements instead of teal? No, most likely not. And if for some reason someone brings it up, you probably shouldn’t have invited them in the first place because they aren’t that good of a friend. If you hum and haw, and stress over all the minutiae details you will miss out on all the fun, and that is not the point of your wedding.
No matter if you’re single, in a relationship, or engaged, wedding fever can consume and overwhelm your day-to-day life, causing you to obsess over an event that will happen sometime down the road. It’s important not to let the obsession with marriage and weddings fog your reality, and continue to live in the present.
[Read: 20 reasons to get married and live happily ever after]
If you’re experiencing these 25 signs of wedding fever right now, remember this simple idea – live fully today, and instead of stressing your mind on the little details, focus on the most important aspect of marriage and weddings – love.
Liked what you just read? Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, we’ll be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life.
Get the very best of LovePanky straight to your inbox!