Having sex with coworkers might seem unavoidable at times. Before you jump into bed, consider what happens if it all goes south and you can’t avoid them.
We spend the majority of our time at work. That leaves us seeing the same people day after day. Sometimes, if you get along with the people you work with, it is awesome. Sometimes, it can be a pain in the ass. Office politics can either be your best friend or your worst nightmare. Just make sure before you have sex with coworkers, you don’t take something fantastic and turn it horrific.
There is a reason most organizations discourage coworker sex. Sex and work don’t mix very well. It is difficult to focus on the task at hand if all you focus on is wanting to find time for a quickie somewhere in an empty office. Some companies do more than discourage it; they make someone quit if they find out there is a romance going on at work.
The 14 pros and cons of sex with coworkers
Don’t get me wrong—there are benefits to having sex with coworkers. A big one being you get to hang out with the person you have romantic feelings for on a daily basis, get to know them, and have their full attention. But, let’s face it, there are times when it can be a good thing and other times when it can be the worst.
These are the good versus the bad *and the downright ugly things* about sex with coworkers.
You get to see them every day
Pro – What is better than seeing the person you have romantic feelings for everyday? When you start having sex with someone or begin a relationship, there is nothing you want to do but be with them every second of the day. Texting or talking as much as possible is the best part about starting a relationship. When you work together, that means endless time together… yay!
Con – Once the first couple of weeks or months wear off, couples aren’t all about being together all the time. In fact, spending too much time together could be the stake in the heart of any good or bad relationship.
Pro – The basis of any good relationship is getting to know someone and what makes them tick. When you work together, you see how a person handles stress, keeps a cool head *or doesn’t at all*, and what they are like in good times and on the bad days. That helps you if you ever take coworker sex one notch higher, like a lasting relationship.
Con – There are sides of ourselves we keep for work and ones we keep for personal relationships. If you have sex with coworkers, then you get to see them at their best and their worst.
There are things best not known about the people we sleep with. For instance, watching them screw someone over for a promotion on purpose isn’t very attractive. Sometimes the things we get to know about someone in a workplace atmosphere changes the way we feel about them personally.
You are more enthusiastic about going to work
Pro – When you have sex with a coworker, going to work to see their bright shining face *and other assets* is like a dream come true. Think about the couple of times you go out on dates; you get to do that every morning. If your relationship is going well, then you look forward to seeing the person you sleep with for hours on end and look forward to the fun day ahead.
Con – You don’t care much about work beyond seeing the person you have sex with. Being too occupied by your attraction and thinking about the next time you’ll get some sex, might distract you from work.
That promotion you were gunning for might no longer look all that important, and you might start slacking off because you have a hard time focusing. Sometimes having sex with coworkers can have a detrimental effect on your work performance and career. [Read: 9 tips for a hassle-free relationship with a coworker]
You can work late nights together and get things done as a team
Pro – Working as a team is only outdone by celebrating with good sex. When you are in sync with someone, working as a team to complete a task makes sex that much more enjoyable after the fact. After you just “knocked one out at work,” you can knock one out in the bedroom.
Con – You work late nights together and get nothing done which tanks your career. You can’t possibly be left in the same room alone together without being all over each other.
When having sex with coworkers distracts you from performing and doing your job, then it isn’t good for either of you. It just might lead to resentment on both your parts or worse, demotion or job loss. [Read: How to handle a coworker crush like an adult]
Sneaking around might add some excitement
Pro – There is something awesome about sneaking around to have sex. Like being back at your parent’s house with an old boyfriend or girlfriend and having a quickie. Sex with coworkers and the naughtiness of it, can be a real thrill for some.
If it is forbidden by office policy, it makes it that much more exciting. Nothing is better than the enticement of forbidden love.
Con – You might have to sneak around or risk being fired, or, worse yet, divorced. If you sneak around to have sex not just for office politics, but because one or both of you is in another relationship, or even married, then you really put a whole lot on the line. Sex for the thrill of it is awesome, but not if getting caught means you lose everything. [Read: 18 clear signs of an emotional affair your probably didn’t notice]
You get to tell other coworkers that you “hit that”
Pro – Coworkers talk about each other in private, let’s just be real. If you bang the hot intern, then that is something you get bragging rights to. If you had sex with that coworker that everyone dreams about, it makes you the alpha at your workplace.
Con – If you sleep with a coworker and someone else in the office told you that they like them or have a crush on them, then if they find out, it might create a firestorm. Not only can they be vengeful and turn you in, but they might also make life a living hell day in and day out. Is it worth living in an office nightmare forever to bang the hottest coworker? [Read: 16 naughty deeds to build your sexual wish list]
It might lead to finding your soul mate
Pro – Not all coworker sex relationships end badly or on bad terms. There are times when you meet the person of your dreams at work. Some jobs are just transient, and if you have a connection with someone, then it might be more important to take a chance to find love than to worry about the repercussions of a job that you don’t really care about. [Read: Dating a coworker: 10 biggest dos and don’ts you can’t ignore]
Since the average person goes through many workplaces and many careers throughout their lives, but you only get one soul mate, you never want to look back and think you didn’t give it a try because it was against the rules.
Con – If it doesn’t work out it, is a nightmare. Enough said. If it doesn’t work out or ends badly, then you get either to work next to them for the next twenty years, or you move along. Those are both pretty crappy options for a little sex with a coworker.
There are times when having sex with coworkers makes sense and others when it just isn’t sensible. And it all depends on how serious you are about your career, what your own relationship status is, what the organizational repercussions are, and what you want out of it.
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