Meeting the person of your dreams doesn’t always mean things are going to go the way you want—especially when the timing is all wrong.
There are times in life when you just step back from a situation, shake your head incredulously, and whisper to yourself, “Why now?” This is a response that occurs in the field of love and romance, just as much as it does in any other.
We’ve probably all experienced those moments when we’re dying to impress someone who’s caught our eye, only for circumstances to throw us a curve ball and ruin any chance we ever had of getting a little more familiar. Imagine how much worse this is when, not only are you attracted to or in lust with that person, but you’ve identified them as the one: your perfect potential life partner!
The trials and tribulations of meeting the right person at the wrong time
Even in the worst situations, there can be inroads to making improvements. Getting what you want is never impossible. Sometimes though, impossible is exactly what it seems, and the following list of eighteen scenarios describe some of the worst times to meet “the right person.”
#1 One’s company, two’s a crowd. Maybe it’s because you’ve recently broken up with someone, or just that you’re in that particular mindset, but the thought of giving up your single life leaves you cold. It doesn’t matter that you’ve met your potential life mate; you want to have a bit of fun, and that’s that. On this occasion, the decision is quite plainly yours.
#2 Simply sick of it. It could be a very serious sickness that you’re dealing with when you meet the right person, affecting your ability to act on it, or it could be a simple cold. If you only have one chance to impress, and your nose is running like a tap, then that might well be enough to scupper your chances.
#3 Studying. You’re in the middle of some important university or work-related study/exams, and the love of your life walks into the room. Are you prepared to sacrifice one for the other?
#4 A drop too far. You meet them in a club or pub, just as you’ve downed three times your weekly alcohol limit. You’re unlikely to make a good impression, and unlikely to pull it back on the night, but it’s worth a go once you’ve sobered up a little. [Read: 10 reasons why making out when you’re drunk is a terrible idea]
#5 Lone wolf. Single parenthood is a very demanding situation to be in, and unless the right person is so right that they can see through that, you’re unlikely to find the time to commit to their pursuit. With a little help from family and friends, though, you might just be able to make enough time.
#6 Light in the pocket. There’s nothing worse than wanting to impress, while your bank balance is plainly not up to the task. Not to despair on this one, though, as there are cheap date ideas that can impress, as well. [Read: How to plan a romantic date even when you’re flat broke]
#7 A couple of woes. If the apple of your eye turns out to be already attached, then you really are in a minefield. There are two ways to go, and either you or someone else is going to get hurt. Tread carefully!
#8 An own goal. The converse of the last point: you’re the one who is attached. Time to do an in-depth analysis of your relationship to see if it’s worth keeping before you make the plunge into uncharted waters. [Read: Love triangles and how it can end up hurting you]
#9 A tale of two eras. You meet your soul mate, you chat, you get on like a house on fire, you find them incredibly attractive…just one problem: you’re old enough to be their grandparent. Generation gaps can work in a relationship, but there are many obstacles to get over first.
#10 Wherever life takes you. Highly typically in this area of issues, you meet the right person just as long-term life plans are about to spring into action. Perhaps it is a new job, a new home, a new life in a new country; again, you have some real thinking to do if you’re going to give up your plans for someone you don’t really know. But then again, that’s love.
#12 In the zone. This one refers not to the state of meeting the right person, but realizing they’re already there, and you’re firmly in the friend zone. This situation has its own issues, but there is a possibility that you can swing them round to your way of thinking with a little persistence.
#13 A family affair. When family problems arise—and let’s face it: the list of such problems is large—you may find yourself entirely unable to focus on other matters. It depends heavily upon what these are, of course, but there may be some room to maneuver.
#14 Ships that pass in the night. Like something from a movie, for no reason whatsoever, you completely fall for a stranger passing you in the street or on a train/bus. The stuff that rom-coms are made of, definitely, but be careful of pressing the question TOO firmly. What might seem like persistence to you may come across as a bit stalkerish to the object of your affections.
#15 Let’s get physical. You’ve let yourself go a bit and have hit the worse shape of your life when Mr. or Miss Perfect walks into your life. Awkward, yes. Difficult, yes. But if they are the kind of person you think they are, then a little persistence should show them the true you that lies behind the less-than-perfect physical frame.
#17 Third party problems. Nothing is worse than trying to impress that special someone when a recent ex is stalking your every move. This doesn’t make a good impression, and you need to get everything out in the open with your new flame before the situation is ruined by outside influences.
#18 A somber occasion. A funeral is not the best time or place to make designs on someone. If, however, you manage to pull it off without seeming creepy, then well done, you!
Although all the above situations present their own difficulties, each of them has the possibility of powering through. If you’re serious about someone, despite poor timing, you may just have to work a little harder than a standard romance.
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Currently reclining with a peaceful and contented smile upon his face, with perhaps just a hint of mystery and steely resolve, Philip Hegarty has an obviously i...