The definition of a bad kisser can be quite subjective. Here are some of the signs and a couple of quick remedies to improve your kissing experience. By Danielle Anne Suleik
Kissing is an enjoyable activity that is shared by two people. It’s an intimate act that’s done out of love, passion, attraction or affection. It’s a simple gesture that people do to show other people how they feel.
People kiss each other for myriad reasons. It can be to show affection. It can be a prelude to sex. It can even denote a hint of longing. Whatever two people’s reasons may be, there’s no excuse to execute it sloppily!
What makes a person a bad kisser?
A bad kisser is someone who has no idea how to please another person’s mouth with their own.
Not just that, but a bad kisser is someone who does not consider other extenuating circumstances like location, mood and their partner’s disposition. [Read: Memories of an embarrassing first kiss]
#1 Dry lips. Kissing with dry lips can be a problem because it can hurt. It also causes bad breath. Aside from that, a dry pair of lips does not look enticing at all.
#2 Slobber. This is the biggest complaint for bad kissers. Overproduction of saliva can sometimes be caused by certain medical conditions, but some kissers think it’s better to lube up their mouths while kissing. Saliva is an occupational hazard when kissing, but too much saliva can very well drown you and your partner in shame.
#3 Biting. Yes, it’s sexy. Too much biting, however, can ruin a good make-out session. It can hurt and it can also make your partner uncomfortable.
#4 Breathing and gasping. You may have a cold or a nasal problem, but breathing heavily on a person while kissing is a turn-off. Gasping for air as if you’re drowning is also a big no-no.
#5 Making weird noises. Sometimes moaning can make a kiss better, but exaggerating your moans of approval can kill the mood, especially when you’re in public. [Read: Does kissing in public turn you on?]
#6 Bad breath. It’s possible that you had too many onion rings or you have an undiagnosed stomach problem. Either way, a kiss won’t get a chance to start if your partner can smell your breath from across the room.
#7 Rhythm. Slow and sensual is good, if it doesn’t bore your partner. A rapid-paced and passionate kiss can also be good, if it doesn’t feel like you’re partner is in a race.
#8 Width of your mouth. There are different ways to access another person’s mouth with yours. Some people open their mouths so wide that they look like they’re eating their partner, while some keep their mouths as tight as possible that it seems like they’re saving their tongues for marriage.
#9 Tongue movement. No one has ever really given a proper tutorial about how to move your tongue while it’s in another person’s mouth. That makes it very awkward for some people to refrain from doing things with it like darting it in and out, using it to clean their partner’s teeth or even using it like a sword to keep the other person’s tongue at bay.
#10 Teeth bumping. It happens once in a while, but it if happens a lot it means that you are trying to shove your jaw into your partner’s mouth. This can hurt and damage your teeth, and can also ruin the ambience with the clacking noises it makes.
#11 Talking. You’re kissing. The conversation about where the relationship is going should be discussed after you make out. Some people think it’s sexy to say sweet nothings while kissing, but it usually turns into a distraction that kills the mood.
How can you fix these problems?
The key to becoming a good kisser is being aware of what your partner likes. You should also take note of where the kiss is happening and in what circumstances it is being given.
Are you in a relationship? Is this a first date? Are you about to have sex? Giving the perfect kiss is about being prepared and making sure that the timing is right.
#1 Brush your teeth. You don’t have to do it before you kiss. Just make sure that you do it before you meet up with your partner.
#2 Drink some water. No one likes to kiss a person with a dry mouth. Not only can water moisturize your lips, but it can also help lessen the taste and smell of what you just ate.
#3 Wear some lip balm. Whether you’re a guy or a girl, run some lip balm over your lips before a kiss. It can make your lips supple and smooth, and using one with flavor can give your kiss a little kick.
#4 Pop a mint. It sounds clichéd and can make you look like you prepared for the kiss, but there’s nothing wrong with that. Your date will thank you for it.
#5 Make sure that you have a modicum of privacy. You can give your partner a light kiss when there are people around, but try not to make out in front of an audience. If you must do so, make sure that the people around you won’t mind in the least.
#6 Make sure that they want to kiss you. Don’t force yourself on someone who’s not in the mood to kiss you. Get a feel of how your date may respond before you dive in for a kiss.
#7 Start gently. Give your date a light peck on the mouth before moving forward. If they reciprocate, you can start moving your lips to a rhythm that doesn’t seem awkward for both of you.
#8 Swallow your spit. Don’t pass it on to your date. If you’re nervous, take a few gulps so that you won’t have a whole gallon of drool in there.
#9 Match your rhythm. You’re not the only one in control here. Try to get in sync with your partner instead of grappling each other with your mouths. Different situations call for different kissing speeds. Know what feels good for both of you and always be aware if anything feels awkward.
#10 Breathe through your nose. Don’t worry. You won’t asphyxiate because of a kiss. If you feel that you can’t control your breathing, stop and relax for a bit before continuing the kiss.
#11 If you must make any noise, do so when you’re in a private setting. Also do it when you’re in the heat of the moment, as opposed to when you’re giving a good night kiss.
#12 Bite gently. If you want to nip on your partner’s lips, do it for a second only. Don’t do it the whole time. Biting is just an accessory to kissing. It’s not an integral part of it.
#13 Don’t make your mouth wider than necessary. If you want to use a little tongue, go for it. Just don’t include your teeth and gums in the mix. You don’t have to open your mouth excessively to French kiss a person. Just open it wide enough for your tongue to moderately move into your partner’s mouth. [Read: 5 tips for making out like a goddess]
#14 Keep your tongue in check. Don’t use patterns that you read about in magazines and click-bait articles. Use your tongue properly by making it move in harmony with your partner’s. See what works best for both of you instead of trying to ram your tongue down their throat. [Read: 10 steps for an oh-so-sexy make out session]
#15 Be quiet. If you must talk, do it after. If dirty talk is involved, take a moment to say what you want instead of mumbling it in your partner’s mouth. Words are sexier when they can be heard clearly.
Some people are naturals at kissing. They’re the ones people swoon about after their dates because they gave such amazing kisses. Be one of those people by following these steps. Just make sure that you think about your partner’s needs as well as yours when you start to make out.