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How to Get to Know Someone on a Date

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If you know the right questions, you can read a person like a book in the very first conversation. Find out how to get to know someone on a date with these tips.

how to get to know someone

In life, if you can get to know someone in no time, it’s a rather special talent to have.

It’s said that it takes years to get to know someone, but it doesn’t always have to take that long.

After all, we date new people and make new friends all the time.

And at times, it takes a while to realize that we don’t really know someone as well as we ought to have known.

If you could understand how to get to know someone you meet for the first time and figure out if there’s a hope for compatibility, it could make life less confusing, especially when it comes to love and important relationships.

While it’s never easy to get to know someone at first sight, especially when we’ve heard that adage – don’t judge a book by a cover, it’s reassuring to know that there’s a chance of something happier in future by meeting someone who seems likeable and nice.

So are you looking forward to get to know someone? Here’s what you need to do.

How to get to know someone on a date

It usually takes a few minutes to let the impression at first sight kick in, but it does take more than just a few minutes to get to know someone beyond first sight and test your compatibility. The next time you’re out on a date with someone, use these pointers on how to get to know someone and chances are, it’ll help you decide whether to have a second date or not.

How is your date dressed?

Yep, a shallow start. But we’re all visual and it does help make a decision on a date. Is your date dressed well or is their attire just loosely put together in the last minute? It’ll help you decide how much of their time they’ve devoted to looking good for the first date.

On a casual first date, most people dress comfortable and wear their favorite tee and jeans. And their dressing style on the first date is an extension of their regular dressing style. Is it too fashionable and lady gaga-like, or does his pants hang low around his knees all the time? Or is your date’s favorite color combination pink and florescent green? [Read: What to wear on a first date?]

And most importantly, do you like it?

Dressing style and fashion apart, if you’re going to be walking down a street arm in arm a few weeks from now, you have to like your date’s attire. If you feel hot around the collar or cross your fingers and hope your friends don’t come by, there’s a good chance you’re not going to like being in their arms in the near future.

How’s the attitude?

If you want to get to know someone on a date, focus on the attitude. How would you describe your date’s personality after the first few minutes? Is it nervous, calm, upbeat, positive, passable or confident?

Your date may feel nervous during the first couple of minutes or may even roll out a few well rehearsed lines, so don’t judge a date in the first few minutes. How’s the attitude beyond that?

All of us have our own preferences in attitude when it comes to dating someone. Some girls like a smooth player like Hitch while other girls prefer a calm and confident Edward Cullen. And men have their own preferences in women too.

Whatever the attitude, if you want to get to know someone on a date and build a connection, you have to like their personality and connect with it. [Read: What to talk about on a first date?]

Is your date focused on you?

Two singles usually fix a date to get to know each other. Is your date focused on you during the date, or do you find their eyes drifting around all the time?

Three kinds of singles lose their focus on a date, singles that aren’t really single, singles that just can’t stop keeping their options open, and someone single who’s lost interest in you as a dating potential.

[Read: What guys always notice on a date]

[Read: What girls always notice on a date]

If you want to have a happy date and a happily ever after with someone, both of you have to stay focused on each other during a first date. It shows respect for each other, and most importantly, it also shows appreciation and fascination for each other. If your date can’t stay focused on you, perhaps the infatuation and charm’s wearing off already.

Where does your date work?

Where does your date work? And what does this person do all day? It seems like a trivial date question, but it can be one of those questions that can test the compatibility of a long term relationship.

If you’re a travel channel host and your date’s a work-at-home software testing geek, your daily interests, hobbies and leisure activities can differ vastly. On the other hand, if you’re dating a budding entrepreneur, you really can’t expect your date to devote time to your romance. While a bit of compromise and effort may keep the next few dates from falling apart, these differences are going to matter and cause a lot of confusion in the months to come. So if you want to get to know someone as a compatible partner, understand that both your professions do matter.

[Read: Best places to go on a first date]

How do you feel?

Do you feel happy to be with this person on a date? Do you laugh without having to hold back because you’re so happy to be with them? Chemistry and attraction is extremely important in a successful relationship. If your date makes you inch closer involuntarily and try to reach for their hands or the next best thing, chances are, there’s a lot of sizzling chemistry in the air.

Do you like it when your date touches you for some reason or are you waiting to finish dessert so you can get into the back seat of the car? If the sparks are flying and you’re really happy to be on a date with this person, there’s a good chance that there’s a happily ever after in the cards for you.

[Read: How to tell if a girl likes you]

[Read: Is he into you?]

Trust your instincts

What does your instinct tell you? If you want to know how to get to know someone on a date, your instincts may usually be your best bet.

An instinct may feel like divine intervention, but there’s also a chance that it’s your subconscious mind picking up signs and clues that your conscious mind is missing out on. You may have been on a few first dates before, and your mind may be noticing some similar traits in this one. It’s like the way you close your eyes and crouch without thinking when something flaps past you at dusk. It’s what your instincts have taught you.

Even if all the signs seem right, or wrong, your instinct may help you be the best judge in getting to know someone and figuring out if they’re a great potential long term lover.

If you want to know how to get to know someone on a date and see if they’re a potential long term lover for you, use these signs. And if you want to ask a few questions and get to know them better in minutes, read these revealing questions to ask on a date.


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Have your say!
  • Cierria
    August 24, 2012 | Permalink |

    How is your date dressed? My guy doesn’t dress fashionable(expensive designer clothes) or really iron his clothes but I still like him.

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