When meeting someone for the first time, a coffee date is the best way to go. Here’s how to have great conversation while sipping something hot.
One of the most important things to do if you want to make a great first impression is make fun, interesting conversation. If you’re on a coffee date with someone, you have nothing to do but talk to each other. It’s a perfect opportunity to let that chemistry flourish.
But if you’re not a good conversationalist, you may need some help. It’s okay if you’re nervous at first, but remaining silent and not contributing to a discussion on a date can lead the other person to think you’re not right for each other.
Why a coffee date is the best for a first date
If you’re not sure what to do for a first date, always get some coffee together. Not only is this a perfect mix between romantic and casual, it’s also a great way to talk without the pressure of eating.
Plus, it can be kept really short if you’re not into the person. You can finish your coffee and tell them you have to take off. On the other hand, if you do like them, it’s a great prerequisite to a longer date night if you decide to get dinner or a movie together. [Read: Top 50 amazing first date ideas to wow your date]
Tips for making the most of the conversation
Before we get into the actual conversation starters, keep some of these tips in mind to help you make the most out of talking to your potential future partner.
#1 Stay away from religious topics. Unless you both met on a religion-specific dating site, try to avoid these topics. You may both have the exact same beliefs but that’s not really important on the first date. Second date? Absolutely. But the first date is about establishing if you have a connection.
#2 Avoid controversial issues. Just don’t talk about stuff people tend to have very strong opinions about. This can help avoid a clash and argument. If they do ask you something, just kindly move away from it and on to a different topic. [Read: 12 meaningful topics that ignite an intellectual conversation]
#3 Have confidence. Be yourself and show them how much you like yourself. Never underestimate the power of having a lot of confidence when making conversation. If you’re loving yourself, they’ll end up liking you, too.
#4 Flirt a little bit. Don’t be afraid to let your flirty side out. You don’t have to be super proper on your first date. Let them know you’re interested if you are and the flirting can also help keep the conversation light and fun.
#5 Let the conversation go where it needs to. Don’t force the conversation into something else. If you’re going off topic from what you have planned, that’s perfectly fine. Let it progress naturally and you may find that you don’t need any starters at all. [Read: How to keep a conversation going with the opposite sex]
Conversation starters for a casual coffee date
Here are some conversation starters to get you on a great topic if you lack the ability to do so without help. You’ll have better discussions once you get these balls rolling.
#1 Are you a big coffee connoisseur? I know it seems cheesy to ask this question while getting coffee but it can actually lead into some pretty interesting topics depending on their answer. Talk about it and if you’re both not into it, you can poke fun at those who are snobby about their coffee.
#2 What’s one thing that’s always fun for you? You’ll learn a lot about them by this one question. It’ll tell you exactly the type of person they are. If it’s outdoorsy, they need nature. If it’s a movie and wine, they tend to prefer the indoors. [Read: 20 questions to ask on a first date for the best conversation]
#3 If you could live in one place forever, where would it be? Notice the way they answer this question. Do they take forever and can’t pick or do they immediately say where they live now? It’ll tell you an awful lot about who they are as a person.
#4 Have you ever been on an awful first date? You can easily make this into a cute joke about your coffee date. Otherwise, it’ll just make for an interesting discussion about the types of dates they’ve been on in the past. [Read: 10 little things that are sure to turn off your date]
#5 Do you like movies or TV shows better? There are people who prefer one over the other. Ask them what they like and why they like that better. Maybe you can take your coffee date and extend it to a night in at their place.
#6 What were you like as a kid? Many people are embarrassed about what they were like. Knowing how that person feels can help you better understand what their childhood was life, too. That shapes a person a lot more than you think.
#8 Do you have any cool or embarrassing nicknames? Everyone has at least one nickname they never want anyone else to know about. Try to get theirs out of them. Make them talk about it and you’ll end up with a fun, laughable conversation.
#9 What’s your biggest goal right now? We all have something we’re working toward. Knowing theirs can help you determine if they’re looking for something serious or a random fling.
#10 Did you expect to be where you are today, 5 years ago? For the most part, people will answer with “no.” But that’s not always true. See if they’re a planner with this question. Maybe they’ve always known exactly what they want to do in life. [Read: 12 life questions to help you visualize your future]
#11 How would your friends describe you? If you really want to know what that person is like, ask this question. They’ll usually answer pretty honestly how their friends would describe them and it’ll be far more accurate than if you asked them to describe themselves.
#12 Do you have any pet peeves? You should always ask this one because it helps you know what to avoid. Plus, you could both have the same pet peeve and have something to bond over.
#13 What does your ideal free time look like? Or their ideal weekend. Really, you just want to know what they like to do in their free time when they don’t have to work. If it’s something you also enjoy, you’ll know just how compatible you are. If you want to make things extra flirty, answer with “go on a coffee date with someone great” and give them a wink. [Read: 10 signs you’re compatible with the one you’re dating]
#14 What was your favorite childhood cartoon? Again, this will tell you a lot about their childhood. What someone watched growing up often influences them a lot more than you might think.
#15 What’s one thing you want me to know about you before leaving today? This is not only a cute question, but you’ll learn something really interesting. They’ll tell you something about themselves that’s important to them – even if other people don’t often notice it. So pay attention and your coffee date will have been a success.